Why is it so hard to say no to her?

Me and my now ex girlfriend had a relationship for 6 years. We were each others first love, first everything.

Now she keeps telling me she wants me to get over her, but then she still talks to me. Last night we were suppose to meet one "final" time but then she backed out because she had been sick all day.

However, she said she wanted to meet me Wednesday night, to still talk but not only that but she wanted us to go to church together Wednesday night...

I of course being an idiot said yes, because I really want to talk and see her one more time, before my strict no contact goes into effect.

I wish she didn't have such a strong hold on me. She continues to tell me she wants me to get over the relationship, and then be her friend, but then she still does small things like this.

We'll go a couple of days without talking, but then something always happens. We technically had this ended 2 months ago, and I think we've only gone 4 days at the most without talking at some point.

I hate being so vulnerable to someone, who is doing the same thing she did to me 3 years ago. By that I mean we had a break-up then and she said we would never get back together and within 3-4 months we were just as serious as we had ever been.

I hate this.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yeah don't be mean, and don't close all the lines of communication down, as you do really care for her. Respond nicely but maybe the next few times you should have plans when she wants to do something, see her every once and a while but slowly become less available to see her. on the phone answer, but get off first. slip in a bit of I'm seeing someone and don't think we should talk for a bit. Yeah this is all fun if you want her back, but you should really actually date another girl for a bit. This one has you too easily your not putting yourself first and she's walking all over you. I've been down this self destructive path and it is very easy to keep doing it, and shell tempt you and keep you there until she finds someone she is actually attracted too. Best bet is move on, and any hope of getting back together will be obvious if you do try and move on. She showed you mow much she cared by ending it, don't listen to the girls bs, look at what she did, she is OK not having you, even though she says otherwise.

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What Girls Said 1

  • You need to say no to her, you are going to end up hurting yourself even more if you continue to carry on saying yes. As hard as it may be say no, seeing her and talking to her will make it ten times more difficult for you to get over her, which I am sure you do not want. She is probably having the same problem she feels like she needs you still and is having trouble letting go. You guys need to stop relying on each other and stop all communication and seeing each other. It's only for the best at this point.

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    • Absence makes the heart grow fonder. She may realize what she is missing. I'm trying to sort things out with a girl and I didn't contact for 3 days, we used to every 1-2 days but her facebook status' seemed frustrated a bit that I wasn't giving her that attention anymore, hoping the give her space. She told me she didn't have time to think over the weekend about things being busy, but told me she had been thinking a lot about me. Take away something she's been used to, that being contact.

What Guys Said 1

  • Because she has you by the balls. Don't answer her phone calls. Don't return her text messages or messages. Remove her from your life. If she can't contact you then she can't control you anymore. Have your brother/sister/friend take away your phone so you can't contact her. Change your phone number.

    If you want out of this try a little harder than just bitching about it.

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