I need help ending my relationship. I am desperate please - anyone throw two cents in.

I currently have a long distance relationship with a girl I thought I really loved... No I didn't think to, I did. I loved her so much. I wanted her to be the mother to my children. She meant so much to me and in a way she kinda does..

but get this..

She treats me like a damn slave, I had to leave my family, parents and siblings because she doesn't like them. I am living with my grandpa and I have to work so I can support her when she moves down here. And when I try to have some "me time" she gets mad at me and accuses me of cheating. I love football and I watch my favorite team when they come on and because they get more attention than her that day I have to apologize. I just am no longer happy in where I am. I feel trapped and I just don't feel like I am in love anymore..

Here is the problem. She is kinda not all that up there in the head. She has told me on several occasions that If I were to leave her she would slit her wrists. And I don't doubt her at all. I want to end things so badly but I don't want to be responsible for a suicide. Please please help me. I have no where else to turn.. Her parents are drunks who are sue happy so they can be rich and buy booze and drugs. So talking to them is out of the question,


Most Helpful Guy

  • Listen to yourself! You know that you are unhappy, but what you don't realize is that you cannot control the future. None of us have a crystal ball that says everything is A-ok.. For crying out loud, she could slit her wrists because of your "cheating via a television"

    Simply put, I know where you are coming from - but you can't beat yourself up for her stupidity. If she wants to endanger her life and ruin yours, it's best that you just cut ties with her and live the remainder of your sanity as best as you can.

    I STRONGLY ADVISE - that if you "don't doubt her" to cut her wrists: That you probably should make a pact with yourself to never speak with her again. She sounds like drama / issues / problems / negativity ... All those things can only bring you down even further, if you let them in your life.

    Sometimes women aren't as "dramatic" as we picture them to be. Be sure not to put this weight (of your current gf's drama) on the shoulders of future prospective women.

    Take care, I hope you get out of this relationship sooner rather than later.

    ~ ArtistBBoy

    • I know you are probably 100% right, its just hard because I did truly used to love her... I will see what other answers I get and sort out what I should do. Thank you man.. you really don't know how much it helps

    • Show All
    • You guys all had great answers and have helped me come to what must be done .Thanks a bunch you guys!

    • Your very welcome, take care amigo

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What Girls Said 3

  • She sounds INSANE! You are not responsible for her in any way. You fell in love with her before you knew the truth about her, and now you're caught in her crazy trap.

    First of all, you are NEVER responsible for someone else's actions. If she decides to kill herself, that is in no way shape or form your fault, even if she leaves a note saying it's because of you. Those are HER issues, her problems and her choices, not yours.

    She's THREATENING you with this kind of crap.

    You need to cut everything off with this girl stat, change your email and number and everything and disappear. You don't even need to break up with her because she's not going to know why you disappeared. You could have had to move to Siberia for all she knows.

    You need to STOP thinking about her and start getting your own life and relationships with your family and job back together. Get the hell away from her and everything having to do with her before she gets into your real life and REALLY f*cks everything up.

    • You guys all had great answers and have helped me come to what must be done .Thanks a bunch you guys!

  • Artist Boy said it best.

    i understand that you love her, but I really feel it's more a pitty love then a true love. People can play the pitty card. We have a natural primal reaction to someone in distress. many people feel the NEED to help. It's hard wired. She's playing on yours.

    She's using you, abusing you and really hurting you. Not all abuse is physical mind you.

    Be honest with her, and yourself. Cut your ties, entirely with her... and then lick your wounds and give yourself time to heal.

    • Well said, and thank you for the compliment.

    • You guys all had great answers and have helped me come to what must be done .Thanks a bunch you guys!

  • You are not responsible for anything another person chooses to do.

    Delineating what a healthy and unhealthy relationship is a process. Spend some time now understanding the difference, here's a good place to start: link

    Trust your instincts and remain true to yourself.


What Guys Said 2

  • dude, tell her this post.tell her what's bothering you and if she can't act normal and the way she acted when you fell for her, then the relationship has no chances.

    Tell her to change if she wants a happy and good future with you. If she doesn't change, then break-up and tell her its not your fault if she slits her wrists because she didn't want to change.

    • You guys all had great answers and have helped me come to what must be done .Thanks a bunch you guys!

  • Dude you need to get your balls back and reattach them. She is controlling you to the point that you are now her bitch and you let her do it...

    • I want to, more than anything else. But I'm just so afraid she'll cut herself... she has done it once already. I don't want to be responcible...

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