My ex flirted with me after he broke up with me, then did a 360 after - so confused!!!! Awhhhh help!

My boyfriend of a year and half broke up with me he explained the reason he broke up with me was he felt he gave his all and I didn't. I tried to reassure him that I would change and work on that he wouldn't budge. I decided to contact him 3 months after he broke up with me. I asked him to meet me for a drink. So he accepted and we had a great time. I am super confused due to the fact that he was flirting with me all night and asked me if I can really do the friend thing. I answered yes but that I still loved him but I would rather have him in my life as a friend then nothing at all. He gave me a big hug and said that meant a lot to him then he started to ramble on about how I wasn't giving my all and he was.. I cut him short and said it was okay. I was so tired of hearing that broken record. Why was he flirting with me and saying I am his type after he broke up with me? Then to top the night he walked me to my car and said he had a great time and kissed me on the cheek and said don't be a stranger after I'm the only one trying to be in contact! Then after that wonderful night he did a 360 back to being cold. Totally don't get it ! In need of feedback guys...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm not 100% sure but it sounds like he's playing you abit. Breaking up with someone for not putting 100% into the relationship and then not giving you another chance if you say you'll change sounds like he might have just wanted to break up with you anyway.

    Maybe he isn't too sure of his feelings or maybe he's just trying to make you crave him more.

    Either way you can't have him in your life if you still love him and he doesn't love you. You need to get over him in order to be friends otherwise your only punishing yourself.

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    • Thankyou for the feedback your totally right. It sounded to me like a lame copout when he said I hurt him . Smart man lol well I cut him off I haven't spoke to him in a month it's hard but I'm doing it . Thanks again :)

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What Guys Said 1

  • playing games

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    • Totally agree thanks for the reassurence!!

    • Thanks for the feedback totally needed it your so right !!!

What Girls Said 1

  • I know exactly what you mean as I am going through something pretty similar. It is like taking a dip in the past while remaining one foot somewhere else. Blowing hot and cold. It is almost like although they are close, they are scared to be too close and get burned all over again.

    In the case of your ex, he sounds like he was playing with your feelings, while telling you you were not giving your all. I am not sure exactly what way he means as there could be a thousand or more ways he is talking about. Someone who wants to remain friends with you, would contact you somehow, not go cold. If he has then he is not being truthful with you and has played you right into his hands again and most likely it is opening up old healing wounds again and you feel a bit emotional over him again.

    I know exactly too, about wanting someone in your life rather than out of completely. I too, am friends with my ex, but it is hard work and it is difficult when you hear about their relationships and girls they are seeing, so being a friend with an ex, you need a heart of steel more or less.

    I think you are really better off without him as he is messing with your feelings and he may well know it. Telling you not to be a stranger and then doing it himself, makes no sense. He should grow up and behave like a man.

    You should tell him you said for me not to be a stranger, and here you are doing it yourself. But one other thing has occurred to me, perhaps you have been inundating him with messages since and he has had to back down as since your his ex things have changed since your breakup and you would have to respect his space and privacy.

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