Whats the best way to end a relationship?

What's the best way to end your relationship if you're not living together?

I've mentioned here a long while ago that my boyfriend of three years had cheated on me with my (at the time) best friend.
Prior to the incident, I was madly in love with him. Like, I'd marry him in an instant. But, he clearly wasn't on the same page.

Then he cheated. And I thought we could work through it.

Now, I don't feel anything for him but, he talks about how he wants to spend the rest of his life with me.

The stress and anxiety of always thinking he was cheating again drove me to move out of his place. Now, we see each other occasionally during the week but thats about it. As I write this, we haven't spoken since Friday night. I haven't wrote him nor has he wrote me. However, he has been liking all my IG posts.

I was planning to end it after Christmas (since we've already gotten each other gifts and I don't want an awkward Christmas) but, a week ago I discovered he bought us tickets for our traditional summer vacation.
Now, I feel like if I leave it's a shitty move since he's already spent all that money for the trip.

I know I need to just end it but, we've been together for years and and he's already invested money to our future.

What should I do?
How should I let him down?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well thats a tricky situation i was going to say leave before Christmas but then i read he bought tickets for the summer vacation well he clearly has feelings for you since he bought the tickets i'd say have a long calm night talk about the situation explain yourself and tell him that what he did is unacceptable and that its the last time it will happen or you will leave him because if its causing you anxiety its not bad for your mental health then see what the output of that talk is then you may be able to choose weather to stay or leave him

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    • We've had that talk already. Back in October I found nudes saved on his computer. When I confronted him, he claimed a girl randomly sent them without him asking for them but, he claims he saved them just to have for his "spank bank"

    • In that situation even if he really loves you apparently he will probably cheat again for some weird sick reason i only told you to have a talk so you dont ruin your relationship if it can be fixed but at the same time i really hate cheaters why they dont commit to their relationship i dont know but they dont deserve a committed partner if they dont plan to commit
      So even if you bought gifts or he bought tickets screw it all you won't live happily with someone who can't admit his mistake and try to fix himself and commit if he had admitted mistake and promised to not do it again i'd say he want to change but lying always makes me feel like he most certainly will cheat again.

Most Helpful Girl

  • You need to start contacting him immediately and just end it the moment that had happened. Tell him it's over. Don't wait until after the holidays. And don't continue to allow him to be on your social accounts. Your just giving that person false hope. This is why you don't get that invested with somebody like that, especially sexually before you are married. You could have found out what kind of person he was way before all of this happened.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 17

  • You should just end it before. Let you guts both return the gifts. Tell him that you don't want contact and block him on everything so he doesn't get false hope that you'll want to get back together.

    It's rough but that's the only way that he'll get over you.

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  • It wouldn't be a shitty move to break up with him. He only bought those tickets in an effort to keep you from breaking up with him. It was a shitty move on his part to buy those tickets. If you don't think your right for each other, end it. Nothing else matters.

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  • After having thought about it, if you are sure, just say it to him. It's no point dragging an emotionless relationship. You'll cry, he'll cry, but it's for the good of both. Just don't do it on text or call. Meet him in person to talk to him

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  • Just be honest with him and tell him the you no longer have feelings for him. Tell him if you continue the relationship you would be living a lie that you still feel the same way.

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  • Just say it. your happiness means more to you than to anyone else and
    sacrificing that for a guy is not worth it.

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  • 9 feet under a single stone just stating the the name and surname of the person down there, and nothing else at all...

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  • just have wild sex with him one last night then tell him your don’t wanna be together do it like on new year’s day. lol

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  • Cut it off, don't keep up any small talk, & don't look back. Quick & easy, but doesn't mean it will be painless.

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  • just end it. do it in a public place so that there are witnesses and its easier for you to leave just in case

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  • Just tell him you're done and don't take no for an answer.

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  • Tell him you want your roads to split but not far enough so the trip would still happen lol

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  • Ghosting

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  • Date me and forget the guy πŸ˜‰πŸ‘Œ

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  • Take an agreement to break your relationship

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  • Just be honest.

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  • Just go with it until u find the right time

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What Girls Said 8

  • Just drive out to his house ask if you could talk outside his house. Tell him ever since you cheated on me I haven't been able to trust you. I want this to be over.

    He can go inside and you can drive off into the sunset alone

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  • Wouldn't you still feel bad if you went on the holiday knowing you were going to break up. If you do it before hand he can get a refund or take someone else

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  • You need to just break it off cleanly. It'll hurt, and he'll be upset, but sugar coating doesn't help anything.

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    • Should I do it in person? I still have belongings at his place and I don't know if I want to deal with the awkwardness of doing it face to face then collecting my things versus via text and let him calm down before I go get my stuff.

    • You should probably go get your things in order then tell him in case he might get angry and destroy them.

    • I don't think he would destroy my things. We were on/off when we first got together and he never got angry towards me. Plus, I'd sue if that happens.

  • Tell him you are pregnant

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  • any but social media

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  • Just Tell Him you can’t forget what he did to you.

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  • Sounds like you want your cake and eat it too. Who cares if you spent money on each other already? You are breaking up for a reason, but if you want to take advantage of the situation and make memories with the guy only to break up afterwards, you're just kinda wasting each other's time. I've always told all my boyfriends "if one day you decide you don't want to be with me anymore, let me know, don't waste my time when I can be with someone who truly wants to be with me".

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  • When did you start to feel nothing towards him? Is it when you would reflect on him cheating?

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