Is it OK to not be crazy about each other?

So we kind of on purpose didn't fall hard for each other. I don't have room for that in my life right now, need to protect myself from heartbreak and losing who I am, when I've got so much else in my life... At least right now, I've got school, work, friends, family, projects, and not much money or time.

Do you think it is a tragedy if someone doesn't ever fall hard... And doesn't want to?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't think I fell hard for my guy.

    He just had the right qualities I was looking for.

    so I'm sure if you think logically and he fits the bill, you should be fine.

    he should feel the same too.

    • I think you're right. He fits what I need, and I'm happy with that. There are a lot of books on things like that, finding the right fit. Heck, there are sites that will match you with 21 characteristics. It seems to work ok.

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  • Nah, it's OK as long as you feel good about it...but it sure sounds kinda boring, however, it's also kinda exhausting and if you're emotionally not up to it right now - just let it be. ;)

    • Yeah, I like boring right now. We're not always boring, it's just that the more we stay in this relationship the less time we have for a relationship since we both are in school and working.

  • You don't on purpose not fall hard for each other, you don't control that. If you're not falling, then it's not because you're stopping yourself.

    • AGREED. You can have a plan of not falling hard. & not fall hard. It does not mean you made yourself not fall hard,.

      I thought I successfully kept myself from falling till I was 19. Then suddenly, despite my best efforts/ wishes I fellllllll really hard. Its not a choice. Just means you are not falling for each other :)

      The part that choice affects , is if you stay or move on. The falling part - well nature takes care of that.;)

    • Well they say not to look into each others' eyes from about 10 inches apart or closer on the first few dates. We are attracted to each other if that helps.

    • No, I get that adn you can be into someone and completely attracted without really falling for them, or maybe it just takes some time for you to really fall for them. But either way, you're not going to control when, if, or how hard you fall for them - even if you think you are.

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