Confused by odd behavior from my ex. I really need some outside opinions!

OK, I will try to make this short. I realize that long, drawn-out love sagas are never interesting unless they’re your own!

Broke up with on/off boyfriend of 3 years/best friend of 10+ years back in February. It was sort of a mutual decision. We were both going through really rough times and after he lost his job he pretty much lost his mind.

Over the summer, I contacted him here and there (mostly drunk texts), but there was little to no contact otherwise.

For the past 2 months, I noticed he was checking my blog daily, sometimes multiple x a day. I’m a writer and I have web stats on my blog and I know it was his IP. Then he started commenting under fictitious names.

Stupid me, I took his constant checking and commenting on my blog to mean that he was still interested. So a few weeks ago I sent him a playful text saying we should hook up/hang out while I’m in town. He danced around the subject, basically saying no without saying “no”. I ended up spilling my guts to him and telling him that I missed him, etc. He finally confessed that he was in a relationship, and that he can’t “coexist” with me without messing up his relationship.

I felt embarrassed that he let me ramble on about my feelings for him before admitting his new relationship, so I sent him an email and told him as much. I also told him to stop checking my website and commenting if he didn’t want anything to do with me, because it isn’t fair to me. He then responded with the meanest email ever- basically a long list of everything he doesn’t like about me- I’m manipulative, I try to use my looks for power over him (?!), I’m crazy, I’m unpredictable, blah blah. He has always been an unstable guy himself, so the fact that he was coming at me from a high moral ground was really shocking to me. This email was out of NOWHERE and it was unnecessarily hurtful. That was also the last day he went on my website.

I responded to his email tactfully and I took the high road. He didn’t respond. Then, this past weekend, I sent him a “final” text message saying that he can do whatever he wants, but at the end of the day we are supposed to be together and he knows it (I know, I regret it now… talk about fatal attraction!). He hasn’t responded and I’m not sure what that means.

Ordinarily, I would write this guy off forever and move on. But it is hard to accept that we had such a strong, intense relationship and now it’s all fizzled down to nothing now? I’m trying to look at this situation from his perspective, but it is impossible to make sense out of it. Should I just walk away and forget it? Maybe send another message retracting my last statement? I feel like a fool but I shouldn’t because at least I’m communicating my feelings and being honest, and not hiding.

It would help to get a few 100% uninvolved opinions on this… I’m too over analytical to see this situation for what it really is. My assessment of it changes every hour. L

Confused by odd behavior from my ex. I really need some outside opinions!
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