Can you remain friends with someone after a break up?

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  • Yes
    Vote A
  • No
    Vote B
  • Are you kidding?
    Vote C
  • Depends
    Vote D
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Most Helpful Guy

  • It is possible but rarely happens. It depends on many factors:

    Was it an amicable breakup?
    How long did you date?
    Does one of you still want to get back together?
    Have both of you moved in with other relationships?
    Will you feel jealous when you learn that your ex has a new SO?

    I broke up last year after a two year relationship. I decided to break up with her even though I still loved her (because I knew that she did not love me and never would.) I needed to avoid her for about three months and I started dating casually. I have seen her 4-5 times since August last year. We have met for dinner a few times and I took her to a concert (Trans-Siberian Orchestra) when my intended date did not materialize. We did not hold hands, we did not exchange a kiss at the end of the evening. . . and I still felt some pangs of regret. However, she is a good person, she is 66 years old, lives alone in a house, needs a guy to occasionally remind her of "homeowner" maintenance things; she needs help. If I remain a friend and can help her without doing any harm to myself, I will. I think we have both been mature in not blaming the other for the failure of our relationship and that has allowed us to maintain some friendship. This is an unusual set of circumstances. I have never previously been able to do this.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I have some friends that experienced break up and couldn't see each other because it ended badly, but some other friends had good break up experience, in any case it is not easy to remain friends in my opinion

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 78

  • It's possible but it doesn't happen often. I have only ever done it once. She is still one of my best friends and I am going to her wedding in a few months.

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  • Very very rarely. I had a girl who had a crush on me, a little crush and she loathes my existence since I rejected her. That's just a crush, relationships are far worse my exs are like fucking demon psychopaths.

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  • If you're busy enough. If you broke up because your lives were both moving in different directions, then neither party resents the other because you both had good reasons. However, if one of you was codependent on the other, or simply comfortable in your arrangement before the break up, then friendship might not be in the cards.

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  • yes it depends. it requires that their is a strong platonic friendship aspect to the relationship and that they can move past the romantic aspect of the relationship after the break up.

    usually tough but certainly is possible to remain friends with an ex

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  • Option D - It depends on the nature of the break up, if an amicable this isn't working and never will work , everything will be fine BUT I am happy to stay in the friendzone till you fall back in love with me, no, no, no, no - Any unrequited feelings, get out before one of you or both get really hurt.

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  • It's awkward and it can make it hard to get over them. Seeing your ex with someone else is just a sight that I don't like to see. Feelings will always be there somewhat. I just try to forget about them and move on because of the emotions.

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  • I have stayed friends with all my exes, though it might help that I'm not in a relationship now. I always feel that I saw something in them that I liked, and even if the relationship didn't work, I still value contact with them.

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  • It's tricky. If you want to save a friendship it's best to give a six month cooling off period before trying to repair that bridge. If you make it that far and things go well try hanging out but don't bring up a new bf/gf for at least a year after becoming friends again.

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  • If it was a bax break up, no. If we got along but just weren't a good fit, then yeah, chances are we're still friends.

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  • Well at first time I'd say not, because the partner who is hurt would not be feeling comfortable. Perhaps after couple months, maybe year or years, this could be happen, but life usually continues forward and getting back into the past, doesn't bring any good things for you.
    Always depends on the partners each relationship is unique by itself.

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What Girls Said 64

  • I try to, but sometimes they're dating someone new who doesn't like the idea of being friends with exes and we lose touch. I don't think I could with my current boyfriend just because the times we took a break I couldn't handle being in the same room with him.

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  • You guys can be civil, you don't necessarily have to be friends.
    It also depends on your relationship, I feel like if the break up was mutual and not drama central or anything, it's possible that you could remain friends.
    I would hope that if I got in a relationship with someone and we broke up we would remain friends.(assuming he didn't do me dirty or something)

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  • This one is really hard for me to share an opinion. It really depends on the situation. If we ended badly, then I honestly don't want to be your friend. If in the relationship you were cool and we were friends before I'd like to keep in contact. But I honestly don't feel keeping an ex so close is good for you long term. You might start to think about "what-ifs" instead of moving forward.

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  • Yes, if the breakup was mutual and ended on good terms. Which is very rare. It happened to my brother and his latest ex, though. They knew they weren't the right fit for each other and both talked about how they were better as friends. They had a very quiet and healthy breakup. They meet for coffee occasionally.

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  • I’m still friends with my first serious boyfriend. We broke up when we moved away to different colleges, but we still talk. We’ve both moved on from the relationship. He’s married now and I’m engaged, but we’re still friends and hangout some with his wife and my boyfriend as a group.

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  • I'm friends with 2 of my ex's. The way I figure it is why lose the friendship just because it didn't work out being more? But my last ex wouldn't be friends with me. I think he was too hurt over losing me so he needed to hate me to move on.

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  • Sure, but it's not a good idea right away. You should take a long time apart to mane good and well certain that neither of you has any lingering feelings. You cannot be just friends with someone if either of you has romantic feelings for the other.

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  • It depends some what on what is the reason for the break up
    I voted yes any way, as for the most part I don't think its an issue, main reason for no i think will be if its as of betrayal or the like, and not just that you did not fit

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  • If things end on good terms definitely. Me and my ex are in the same friendship group, and although we kept our distance for some time we're not back to the same level of closeness as before we can still hang out with eachother

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  • Not right away after a break up. Maybe later on when both of us are finally over each other. Because I cannot be just friends with someone I have feelings for. I will end up hurting myself or him.

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