My ex cheated, I feel so jealous?

I recently found out my boyfriend of 1.5 years cheated on me by sexting another girl for a few weeks, and was sending compliments and flirty messages to other girls online. When i found out, i was devastated. He is my ex now, and it’s been 4 weeks since i found out. I still feel so jealous when i think of it, i feel betrayed and i feel insecure. The girls he messaged are girls he knows, and they’re really pretty. The girl he cheated on me with, i just feel embarrassed and humiliated. I am so confused. Because she knew he had a girlfriend, and her morals and my ex’s morals are just mind boggling to me! I feel so small inside, and i feel pathetic. I feel i did not deserve to be cheated on, and i am truly disgusted. Sometimes the feelings of pain and hurt aren’t as strong, but i just feel like my heart is being punched 100 times, and i can’t shake this feeling of humiliation. My confidence and self-esteem are shot. I know i wasn’t a perfect girlfriend, but my ex cheated on me because he was stressed by my insecurity and claimed he was miserable with me at times. He said “those girls were an escape”. I feel like complete crap!
My ex cheated, I feel so jealous?
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