How to get re-motivated after a long-term relationship breakup?

I dated a guy for nearly two years. My whole world revolved around him & I never took any other relationship in the past as serious as I did with this last guy I was seeing. I actually wanted a future with this guy, I made plans for our future together. It got to the point where everything I was doing was for him & the relationship. The relationship was my main focus & his happiness my main agenda. Everything I did, I did it with him in mind. With our future in mind. He was my motivation for why I was trying to better things in my life, for him, for us. I found some things & I had to walk away. We're sort of not seeing each other until he figures out what he wants. (We also both agreed we both need to improve in many areas of our lives) I'm having trouble living life now though, I use to wake up every morning motivated & wanting to do so much for him & my future with him but now that that's gone I feel lost & I don't know what to do anymore. I have no feeling to do anything, not even my hobbies anymore. I no longer see a purpose in anything I do. I don't even know if I care about getting a degree of any sort now that there may no longer be a future of us being together. I am very in love with him & I really care about him & I want him to be happy which is why I'll accept to let him go if he decides to choose a different path in life & no longer wants to be in a relationship with me but now I'm lost & I don't know what to do. For nearly 2 years my whole world was about the relationship & now I'm confused & lost & unmotivated. What should I do?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Having found myself in quite the same mental and emotional condition as you , for the very same reasons, I can only tell you to give it time. Imagine the existential angst I've felt the past year after my wife unexpectedly ended our 19 year marriage.
    There is no silver bullet. What did seem to help was to get selfish. Do what you want when and where you want. A friend for companionship during these times helps some, but to hell with everyone else. The next chapter in your life needs to be about you. Be careful though , you may learn a thing or two about yourself along the way.
    Godspeed.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well first of all find yourself before worrying about another guy. That’s the only important thing here. You’re world should never revolve around a man. Any guy you allow in your life is only supposed to be SUPPLEMENTAL. Nothing more and you should be your own damn motivation. Jesus take the wheel! You don’t even want to finish school because y’all might not have a future together. Giiiiirl

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What Guys Said 2

  • Yup I've been there. It hurts and it still hurts.

    Right now don't push away your family and close friends from helping you or comforting you. I made that mistake a long time ago and even if they forgive you it'll never be the same if you wait too long to fix that mistake.

    As for motivation, if you're a person of faith then you already know who to turn to but if you're not then focus on yourself, your family and your circle of friends.

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    • I have no family that I'm close to & I ditched all my friends for him. They stopped talking to me a long time ago

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    • Maybe you need a new friend... Someone you can talk to... Not on-line but in person.

      I got friends in social media but I'm pretty sure I won't get along with them if they were my friends I see in person everyday.

    • yeah I'm trying to get a hold of an old friend of mine & the only friends I have on social media are people outside my state but I've ditched social media all together a while back

  • Go through the full emotions to move on, and focus on yourself. Start pursuing things you like

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What Girls Said 2

  • It is really complicated learn to be just one again... But time helps a lot... Really. Now you feel lost and it is okay feeling that way. But one day is going to be easier I promise you... It stop hurting... You will be okay

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  • "Someone out there is looking for everything you are and everything that you have to offer"

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