What to do with your relationship when you are going abroad?

I had a 3 year relationship with my boyfriend, but I happend to be offered an excellent job abroad on a 1 year contract (which means it’s just one year, they won’t renew or extend) I told my boyfriend and at first he understood and the next day he broke up with me because there was no point in going on with the relationship if I will be leaving soon, on his POV. The issue here is it just hurts so much, to be without him, for him to not understand the magnitude of the opportunity and him to be mad at me.
Should I try to take him back?
should I ignore the situation and look for him when I come back and if I still want and he still wants to, start all over?
Or should I not speak to him again because he is not supporting me?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't know why he did it, but he should have stayed with you for support, even if he wasn't there with you... or visiting you when the chance comes.
    one year is not heavy, and the days are running faster than we expect.
    his behavior and reaction are wrong, so you don't have to stay in that relationship anymore.

    eventually, you will forget.
    wish you luck with that job.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Were you in a good place in this relationship before the job offer? Is he just using this a convenient excuse to break up because he was unhappy?

    One year is really not that long in the grand scheme of things if your relationship is one that you both want. I say this because I’ve just done a LDR, that has finally ended. That’s not to say it won’t be hard, it bloody is, but it’s definitely possible, especially if you have an end date.

    In my LDR, we had only dated for two months before I left... we made it work for 10 months, because he moved to where I was.

    How far away are you moving? How plausible would visits be during that year?

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    • We’ll we did have hadn’t our arguments, but we were on a really good place when I got the offer and told him, I felt that we were on the best part because we were both being mature about everything, etc. I was planning on telling him to go visit and and i could help with the expenses, or something similar, but he ended it before I had the chance. It is kind of far, about a 5 hour flight

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What Guys Said 5

  • I think you should move on and don't look back. You had the choice of him or the job and you took the job. I'm not saying that was the wrong thing to do, but realistically if he was more important you would have turn the job down. Move on and meet someone else

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  • Long distance doesn't work. One of you would eventually cheat (probably the one abroad)

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  • Trust and support is key. Either he can't trust you or he can't trust himself its not uncommon. Happens a lot for people in the military.

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    • So I should just move on?

    • Honestly if he can't stay by your side for something that can benefit you both then I don't think its worth it. A real man would support you in everything you do if he truly loved you. That's my opinion.

  • You can either have a long-distance relationship or break up.

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  • You should try to explain to him that you're committed to him and you won't cheat. Although you might not have given him any indication that you will cheat, but some people still worry. 1 year really isn't that long. Sometimes long distance relationships can make the relationships stronger...

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What Girls Said 1

  • Some people don't do long distance relationships. If he believes it won't work out while you're away, why waste each other's time?
    You chose a paycheck over your relationship, how would you expect him to react?

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