Are breakups hard for men as well?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes. My first wife told me she wanted a divorce. That she loved me but wasn't in love with me. My ego was hurt but I was thrilled. It wasn't a happy marriage and I couldn't wait to meet new women.. But, when I actually got back on the dating scene I found my wife wasn't as replaceable as I thought. And as messed up as I thought she was. It really hit me a month later on Christmas.

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    • What made her different from the other girls?

    • We were used to each other. The women I met out in clubs were outright awful for me.

Most Helpful Girl

  • i asked my boyfriend before me and him got back together. I asked him was it hard? and if it was why didn't you reached out to me?

    he said that he was hurt and he didn't really know how to talk to anyone about it. because us women we have girlfriends we can talk to, cry to, vent to which is true. for men, they have ego that they have to protect. it stupid but that's how theyve been. it doesn't mean that they have no heart, its just it takes longer for them to move on for they dont want to talk about it.

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What Guys Said 32

  • Each side is going to see this through the prism of their own gender and perspective, and in any given instance, the answer will be different. However, overall, various studies that have been done - most famously by Kinsey - show that overall, men actually take break-ups worse than women.

    Part of this has to do with the fact that women are more verbal and social. They will express their feelings and so cope with the stress better than men.

    Part of this is motive. In general - and again, these are tendencies, not metaphysical truths - women will break up with a man because they believe that they will find something better. Men, on the other hand, will break up because they no longer feel loved and respected. One is moving on to get something better. The other because they feel hurt. It makes a difference.

    Note: Women are also more likely to cheat for the same reason - because they met someone who they think is better. A man because he no longer feels loved and respected by the person he is with. (Frequency of sex - which means something different to a man and woman - often plays a huge part in this.)

    It runs against the popular cultural stereotype, but the research surprisingly shows that women will break up (and cheat) for more selfish reasons then men.

    To repeat, before someone out there throws a hissy-fit, these are statistical tendencies, not absolute truths. Each particular case will have particular circumstances as context, but overall, though, men tend to take break-ups harder then women, contrary to popular belief.

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  • I think guys when guys fall, we really fall when it comes to breaking up. We get depressed, we gain weight, we lose interest in other shit, we start to think every girl is a manipulative b*****

    But any guy or man who has any common sense will tell himself, okay stop acting like this, snap out of it, chalk it up as a bad experience but learn from it, have standards but lower expectations (e. x: don't assume a girl you date a few times will be your soul mate). But then there are other guys/men who hold onto those feelings and they don't change -- they could become abusers, manipulators or etc for the rest of their lives.

    I was in that rut, I really liked a girl and she tore my heart and stomped on it and didn't care. But I eventually told myself, who gives a fuck what she says, if a girl is rude, the guy should consider it a blessing in disguise that it did not work because why would he want to live his life with someone like that... and the same goes for girls/women who go through breakups with guys.

    Eventually, I got over that girl, yeah she's an attractive girl but I motivated myself to do better in school, become more religious and etc when she knit picked or complained about my "flaws". I know there is a better girl who awaits for me.

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  • A man's a human being with a brain and a heart. He too will feel just as much pain and heartbreak like any other would.

    How much he hurts/suffers/feels pain from the breakup depend on the circumstances between the man and woman.

    I've experienced it personally myself and although I'd never wish it upon anyone else, it certainly tests your character/mindset and ultimately whether you're going to make it or not x

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  • I would argue that they're actually harder for men, especially if it was one we really had placed effort and felt accomplished in.

    My last relationship broke nearly 2 years ago, and ever since I dispise the very idea of relationships beyond "really close friends". As soon as I even have a sense that someone is catching feelings I break it off, keeping anyone from getting too close.

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    • I thought I was the only one. I also tend to avoid getting too close with women. I don't want another girlfriend for a long time

    • I had a bad experience and could not trust people to get too close. But realising that I am pushing people away, not everyone the same. They are nice ones out there. Also if you have an inkling that they are taking advantage or you are making all the effort, then you don't need to pursue it any further.

    • Wow I'm the same. Guy interested in me. I eventually develop feelings for him. I become clingy but I really try hard not to be (I believe men don't like clingy girls), so I tell him we should not talk everyday.
      I'm in a relationship now. I didn't want to but I unconsciously fell for the guy. He's putting so much effort that I've never had other guys do this. I don't think the relationship will last tho for many reasons, but he thinks it will. I see what's coming.

  • Yes it is, man is also a human being. If he really loves a girl he will never forget her and it will take ages to move on. I am not saying it's same with all the guys, not everyone are same. It also depends on how the guy bought up, the situations and other things. And if a guy really loves a girl they will never speak wrongly about her.

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  • My first breakup was orders of magnitude harder for me than for my ex. She didn't even care. We kept going back together and breaking up several times and last time none of us suffered, since e didn't love each other anymore. But from my experience I'd say guys suffer a lot more. I sure did

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  • My ex for 5 years broke up with me fir another man. I took me a month only. I moved on and i know for fact she will contact me and id make fun of her when she does. I treated her like a princess but she was not thankful

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  • no were all heartless shells with no feelings what so ever go become a feminist
    what kind of stupid question is this of course they are. we aren't fucking robots

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  • Extremely. We have feelings to. Breakups suck for everyone.

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  • It depends on whether we wanted the breakup or not and how attached we were. I was with a girl for a year, but by the time she said we were done I had already decided months earlier than we needed to end. I shrugged it off.

    Likewise, there was another case where things ended badly with a girl I thought was absolute gold. When that ended, it was like getting the flu. It was the first thing I thought about when I woke up in the morning.

    And then one day, I woke up... and it was the second thing I thought about.

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  • You are serious? If it’s hard then for men. Especially when it’s a divorce.

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  • Yes.

    I will refrain from making a sarcastic addition.

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  • It depends on the guy, cause some do and some don't it's based on their personality

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  • Nope.

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  • Hardest id say

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  • why do girls think guys got no heart?

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  • They suck ass

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  • For emotional guys, yes it is so difficult.

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  • Yes.

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  • HAHA No were heartless creatures... ofc it sucks

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What Girls Said 9

  • Girl, from my last relationship I feel like they don’t give a shit 😂 but nah, of course is hard. Obviously there’s people that move on quickly and don’t even care but that happens with women too.. it kinda depends on the situation. If it was a serious relationship, it will hurt a lot for both parties

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  • Men have feelings too... So obviously. If a man loved someone then it's hard to break up. They may show less emotions but that doesn't mean that they don't have them.

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  • im not sure about this one. my ex broke up with me and after many months, told me that he wanted to commit suicide.
    my boyfriend now, doesn't take breakups too easily either. he says that he's going to die if i ever leave him

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  • Yes, some of them even suffer for a way longer period of time than (most) women do. A good friend of mine was lovesick for about 6 years after his first breakup.

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  • For some yeah
    It depends on how deep the relationship was (deep meaning emotionally )

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  • I don't get why they wouldn't Guys are human too.

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  • Yes. Most men take ages to get over a woman.

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  • Of course not. Everyone knows men are incapable of emotion!

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  • Yeah and it depends on the situation. I know some men who gets really down and upset about their relationship ending.

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