I come to accept that I am the side chick in the relationship I had with somebody I loved. Despite breaking it up I still feel so broken why?

No I didn’t know I was I guess I was in denial. Maybe somebody can tell me something inspirational because i am feeling pretty down right now. And i doubt I am ever going to find a person to love the same way I did with him.

I just need to know why I shouldn’t run back again with him because sometimes I think even if he hurt me all this time he did make me the happiest sometimes when I would forget he was hiding me from his wife and family.
I come to accept that I am the side chick in the relationship I had with somebody I loved. Despite breaking it up I still feel so broken why?
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