Ex blames me for everything?

My ex and I were involved in a long-distance relationship for one year, chatted daily. We are both in our mid-40s. We had A LOT in common, talked about getting married and me moving to his state. He visited me 3 times in person. (Some of my friends thought he was cocky and "all about him", but he was very sweet to me. Looking back, he never took responsibility for his own mistakes and always had a way of blaming me). I never visited him because he lives with his parents and it wasn't until recently that his mother gave the green light for me to visit. From what he's told me she sounds very controlling, wanted to cook our meals and get to know me. He has a teenage son but all our conversations centered his mom and her needs.

On his most recent visit, he was very different and insecure. On the 4th day here we talked about the future and visiting. I told him that I was uncomfortable staying at his parents house and I wanted to stay in a hotel. He said that his mother would get upset and that I was "disrespecting" and "disobeying" her. He said that we had to do it her way this time and our way next time. I asked him what that meant but he got mad and stormed out of the bar. He informed me that he called his mother and we were broken up. We had never broken up before so I cried, pleaded. He said he can't be with someone who disrespects his mother. The next day I tried to talk about things calmly. He got mad and said he was done and left - 4 days early. I was completely heartbroken because 2 days before we had celebrated my birthday and had a great time.

I contacted him 2 weeks later via email, said I was sorry and wished him well. . He sent the longest reply I have ever seen and made a big list of things I did wrong over time, why he couldn't be with me. I've had no contact for a month but having a hard time. Why he is so angry and blaming me for everything? And if he was on the fence, why did he come all the way here and spend a lot of money?
Ex blames me for everything?
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