Im really desperate for an advice?

So the story is..
I broke up with my ex when i was suffering from depression and lots of damn stuff so basicly my life was hell!! And she was literly busy all days. Not an excuse i know i made a mistake. Anws like 1 month later i apologized and ask her back but she rejected but wanted us to stay friends which we did. I couldn't forget her and i felt like she is too. So on valentine day i gave her this gift of our previous memories. Its something i worked on all week 6 hours/day. She said she cried when she saw it but she won't take me back. I was freakin broken but accepted the idea of moving on! When she felt i was moving on she is trying so bad to play mind games with me and make me jealous and can't deny its fuckin working!!! I don't know why the hell i still love this bitch so damn much!! I want her killed at the same time too!!! I know most opinions will be move on which i have tried a million times tho! Sry just needed to let this shit out!!
Im really desperate for an advice?
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