Are you cynical?

We've all been there (well most of us)... Failed relationships that haunt us in different ways. Why are people so affraid to love again? Why do people become cynical? If you've been divorced, are you unwilling or feel less likely to tie the knot again?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Some past relationship or bad breakups have left ugly impressions on us.

    I used to be cynical, not anymore cuz life's too short and too fun to always be thinking that way.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • In my opinion especially if you've invested years into someone and it fell to ruins is that one might be afraid to invest again due to trust. However we cannot punish others or rather stop others from wanting to love us.. or shut ourselves down from love jjst because one (or a few) bad seeds came in our path... for all we know they could have been im our way to direct us to the right person in the end all along. Me personally... though my past relationship has been crusty the bigger picture of knowing the right one is out there for me prevails over my fear.

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What Guys Said 13

  • Yes I have a tendency to become cynical in that sense, because when it comes to a relationship, I give it my 100% and if there is a failure even after that then I just dont have the power or capacity or even the ability to give it my 10%, because if my 100% isn't enough anything less than that is pointless wither ways.

    And I dont think its particularly bad, because it would good if people took some time off and worked on themselves and only got back into the game when they were ready for it, because if they aren't completely ready, that is going to cause problems in the next relationship.
    If one gets into a new relationship before being ready for it, not matter how much the partners love each other, they are going to have problems because it is going to hurt both of them.

    If you are to be binge watching movies on your mobile, its better to start with a 100% battery, or else the phone is going to die half way through and the movie will be ruined.
    I dont know if the thats the right analogy, but you get the point 😅

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  • I've had some absolute doozy relationships in the past but that hasn't stopped me from trying to find the one! Unfortunately some people do become bitter and cynical due to failed relationships in the past hence the reason they bring so much emotional baggage into their next one! What they don't realise is that they end up sabotaging their next relationship in the long run!

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  • Because they are afraid they will get dumped again and they can't handle it. I had a very bad experience with love as well but i think that love still persists and that a girl somewhere in this world is praying for me to not get in love with anyone else but her

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  • I think its better to just remain single and just live a great life

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    • Amen.

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    • 😃 yeah I agree. People should be more inquisitive.

    • Yupp ☺

  • I’m only cynical towards one thing and that is treatment by women in a nonprofessional setting. I don’t trust them when they say things to encourage me or compliment me since their actions never match their words.

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    • Especially when they say bullshit like I’m a great catch and act surprised I’m single. Yea, be honest, don’t say that shit when neither you nor anyone you know would go on one date with me.

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    • Within a professional context, I wouldn’t have a problem with it. It’s in personal contexts that I take issue.

    • Ahh ok. That's fair.

  • I'm very cynical when it comes to relationships. I feel like women use sex to reel men in and then they can treat us like an accessory to their lives.

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    • @jessture you feel or have experienced this?

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    • No its on almost every level. Women who I thought were platonic friends start flirting and leading me on just to get what they want. Women in relationships so enthusiastic about sex, but thn once the relationship is solid they could care less, and then my entire life starts getting micromanaged. No more weekends, I now have to be on a leash.

      Single life is pretty much the only option if I want to have hobbies and friends. Women see both of those as competition and will pretend it's all good, just to passively start demanding I eventually eliminate both.

    • Ahh I can see how that's difficult, and unreasonable. Men are normally more easy going and could "care less" about what a woman does during her free time as long as she's not doing anything she shouldn't be doing.

  • I am, in the philosophical sense. Diogenes is a guiding figure to me. Beyond that, I prefer to be sarcastic.

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  • Im just cynical in general because i dont trust people. I want someone to love but i dont want to get hurt again.

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    • @fueledbythc that's understandable. Do you feel that you may be limiting your chances because you don't want to get hurt again?

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    • I just need enough confidence so i can handle rejection. It doesn't matter if im ugly as long as i try. Thanks for the advice.

    • Yeah yw

  • If you're conscious you must be depressed... or at least cynical.

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  • If I get a divorce I will never marry again.. I would have no reason to. I'm the type of person that doesn't let many people in and even the ones I do I generally protect myself from them. I've committed 15 years of my life to my wife... we've both made our mistakes and worked through it. However, I would never be willing to do that with anyone else. I am scarred for life as I know what happens when you let your guard down... It's not being afraid to love.. it's a weighing of options.. me and my wife split up once and I started dating a girl a few months later... one of the first things I told her was that I'm here until it's not fun anymore. She completely understood that I wasn't willing to waste any more of my life feeling what I had felt.. being hurt by someone you're in love with is the ONLY type of emotional pain that can cause physical pain as well.

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    • @MrGrub I understand where you are coming from. Do you feel that this concept of "not marrying again" if you divorce may prevent you from finding true love? (although you're still married! 😂)
      Do you feel as people get older it's easier to just be a bit more risky since their isn't much left to loose... Or maybe we're a bit wiser? A heart break here or there is better than loneliness right?

  • Not afraid where you been just waited for u that's all

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  • I used to be. But after a period of maturation, I'm far from it. I love your question.

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  • Yea I was once I kinda still am but I’ve moved on from the bitch

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What Girls Said 1

  • I mean my step dad is in his mid 50s now, he's gone through 2 marriages (one ended by separation through divorce and the other though death (my mum)). With his age and all that he's gone though, he feels tired and scared to put himself out there again to find love. He's content with enjoying what life has to offer. Everyone is diffrent and has their own reasons/story.

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