Why is he shutting me out?

Ive been with this guy for 3 years. he was my first ever boyfriend. I waited until I was 17 because I wanted something perfect and when I found it, it was amazing. I was his 4th serious relationship so he's done stuff like this before and knows how relationships work etc.

it hadn't been working for about 6 months and too be honest I wasn't putting the effort in as I had major uni stresses to deal with. once they were over he pretty much ended it with me and I started off fine, then I found out I failed my 2nd year at uni and I told him. he came over looked after me with a bottle of wine and a DVD (no sex) and when he dropped me off home the next day he said if I ever needed him I know where to find him. he's been refusing to answer my calls since, then I went back to uni where I'm struggling and far away from him. on the rare occasion I did get through to him he was cold and distant.

then this weekend I popped home and got him too come over too pick up one of his shirts. when he was actually talking to me face to face he seemed really sad and even cried a bit and said he hates seeing me because he misses me but he doesn't want to miss or love me. he went home and I haven't called him this time, but I haven't heard from him either. To be honest yes it probably is for the best but right now I just want him back because he's all I've ever known. do you think he was really shutting me out because he missed me or was he letting me down gently?


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What Guys Said 2

  • He could be doing it for good reason - for example, he actually has a girl in his life that you are not aware about. If this is the case, then consider it as his polite way of telling you, "Sorry, but I am just not interested in you that way." It is much better than having to find out the hard way, which may involve a lot of emotional outbursts, frustration and hatred for years to come.

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    • I've asked him if there is someone else and he's said no..... he's actually been dating a whole lot of different girls just because he can. If he told me the truth about tht then he wouldve told me if there was someone else in particular.

  • i say letting you down slowly all I can say is try looking ...there is other fish in the sea ..but never again that particular fish ...idk

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