I'm 23, he's 21. We've been together for 3 years. I mentioned moving in together about a couple months ago and he said he wasn't ready. I asked him if he ever considered getting married and having kids. (I didn't mean right this second. But he took it that way). He got mad and said yes but that he wasn't ready yet. I just wanted to know if that's something we see for the future.
He then told me that the more I ask, the longer he'd take. (As a way to shut me up. I guess.) but I had only ever asked three times in our 3 years together.
So I got a job offer about a month and a half ago, around the same time I found out I was pregnant. The current job I have is so-so. It's only part time and no health insurance. (I'm an Nurse Practitioner) I got a job offer in a big city, 6 hrs Away but full time, 4 times the pay, and insurance. I accepted it.
I gave my boyfriend a scenario of this. Like, what would he do if I got a job offer like this. If he would come with me. And he got mad and said his whole life is here in our small town. And that he's still got a year left of college. And that he can't drop everything, etc, etc.
It was our anniversary two weeks ago, we went to the beach (we live like an hour away from it). Had an amazing time. I start my new job this upcoming Monday, and yesterday I asked him about having kids. Again, got mad at me for bringing it up and said he wasn't ready. Just had to make sure, I guess. I asked for a break, he got beyond pissed and left.
I just want to know if I'm making the right choice. Like why tell him if he's repeatedly said he's not ready? I won't be asking for child support or whatever. This new job is enough to support me and my baby.
Most Helpful Guy
You are pregnant with someone's child and you are HONESTLY asking if you should tell them or not? OF COURSE YOU TELL THEM!!! Are you even serious?
Who gives a ****** what they've said before. That is hypothetical. This is real, who knows how they'll react tot he real thing. Lots of people don't want kids but love them immensely once they show up as a surprise.
This is the kind of messed up lives, broken home situations and abortions that plague this society because people think sleeping around is just sport. This kid is going to lose their life or grow up in a broken home with no father because these couples think sex is all fun, games and sport and don't realize it is more serious.
Who knows what this guy is going to do. I'm sure the kid will be glad to know they grew up without a father because 18 years ago mom got a good job offer. She'd die of starvation and have a worthless life if not only for this ONE job. I'm sure on your death bed your only regrets will be that you didn't make enough money and work enough hours and you wish you could go back and go make more money and work more hours because that's what makes life worth while and gives you joy in your heart.
You're pregnant and now you are taking off with the child to raise with no father or you're going to kill the child AND you are thinking of not even telling the father? What is wrong with humanity.
You two need to sit down and talk all of this out RIGHT NOW and he needs to know EVERYTHING.0