Question Regarding getting back with my EX... Really need as much advice as possible...

I have recently posted about my chances of getting back with my ex girlfriend. A shortened version of the story. My ex and I were together for three years. Our relationship was unbelievable, but over the course of the last 6 months things started falling apart. It began in a conversation about moving in together then moved to getting married (a month later the conversation). Making major chanes in my life already (finishing Graduate school and starting a new job) I got defensive and made up excuses for my immaturity. This has led to bitterness and her unhappiness. So after a mutual break up, we seperated. I realized that this isn't what I want, I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I always treated her well, we very rarely fought. I went through the typical male breakdown and begged for her back, but I only did this within the first 24 hours. Since then, I have talked to her a couple of times. She wants to remain friends and says there could be a chance for her but for now she needs to figure out what she wants. On Friday I broke down and called her, we got into the conversation bout us again. This time, with my emotions cooled, I told her the truth. I told her I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, marry her and have kids with her. She just kept saying and crying "why couldn't you tell me this 6 months ago." I told her I didn't expect to take my back right away, but this is what I want. I told her about my action plans and everything, but she continued to say at this moment it can't happen and it may never happen. I took 4 days without contacting her, but then I broke down and sent a text telling her about a big project I have at work and presentation I will be doing. She responded "Awesome ;) I know you'll do great :)". I understand this doesn't mean much but it leaves a little hope. I am giving her space, and have decided that I am going to contact her next week to see if we can meet. I plan on doing something like going for a walk on the bay with her (we could do coffee but I thought this was more personal with little obligation). I know I need to rekindle what made her fall in love with me when we meet without bringing up nostalgic memories or asking about us. I want to know what else I should do here. As well, I don't want to mess this up. I am 24 and she is 25. This is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I have been holding it together but I could break at anytime. I am a strong person, but she is my other half, my best friend and my lover. I have been in serious relationships before, but I never fought for any like this, nor did I want to. I know she loves me and I know she wants to spend her life with me but I don't want to lose my chance and everyday I am not with her I am falling apart. Help me out. Am I initiating a meeting too early (it will have been 3 weeks and 3 days after we broke up for when I wanna meet)? Am I going about this right? what other tips can you all provide?


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What Girls Said 1

  • Don't try too hard to get her back. The more you push her to be in a relationship, the more she might push back. She said that she still wants to be friends, so give her that. After awhile of being friends, she will start to remember what it was like being with you. As long as you give her what she wants and respect her decisions, she will fall for you. But be sure to give her her time. Time with her as close friends is better than not at all right?

    • Oh god no, maybe after months have passed, but if you emotionally soothe her while she is getting over you, two things will most likely happen. She will see you as a friend only, and may even start to ask for advice about other guys. and two it will be like torture for you, where you will analyze everything and cling to hope, and wish for a sexual moment, which for her will just be a moment of weakness, she needs to miss you.

What Guys Said 1

  • Check this out...and good luck => link


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