Is it selfish to outgrow an otherwise happy relationship?

While one party is still madly in love, the other party is just looking for something else/ wants to work on her/himself because the relationship doesn't *add* to their life. The relationship itself isn't bad, but just not fulfilling, or maybe my expectations are too high...

Is it selfish to give up on someone who tries so hard? How does one explain this to someone madly in love? Does the 8 month long distance part of the relationship make a difference?

*add = same fights, not enough time spent together, sees the person as less mature, doesn't feel challenged to be a better person.
Is it selfish to outgrow an otherwise happy relationship?
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