I hate him, what should I do?

but I don't want to have our relationship break up. This is so frustrating. I wish life was easier.

Updates:
I want to be with him because I'm married to him. Divorce is against my religion and looked down in my culture.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • i think you should talk to him tell him how you really feel w/o being angry all the time. there's so many ways to express the way you feel then just fighting, you guys are 2gether for a reason. love is a powerful thing. and you guys should respect each other always. treat him like you just met..the relationship will last longer...n he will see a change in you..even if its not your fault..b the bigger person.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I know how much You love him...But dear...You should understand that...If you really think that he doesn't love you any more and using you merely as an instrument for pleasure,U will have to leave him...Its for your own Good..I have read one of your comment and From that I understand he is not at all Good to you...Come to reality...I know how it feels for You to leave this Guy because he was the one whom You evr slept with...But I don't think this will work out Miss...I am not hurting your feelings for him..But Don't get trapped and get dirt on you again...or else You might miss a happy life still waiting for you ...

    The basic foundation of any realtionship is knowing each other more than You have ever knew about yourself...

    But I hope evrything will be fine...

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    • Oh dear..You are married to each other...Sorry...I dint knew that before I answerd!!..

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    • It's OK. Thanks for your answer. It helps to know that there are caring people out there. *sigh*

    • Even I don't agree with divorsing!! never will... If a Laptop stops working a day,nobody will throw it away...they will see if there is any complaint that YOU CANT SEE FROM OUTSIDE...and when we find that and repair it ...evrything will be fine and we will not regret....Life is far more valuable than any OBJECT in this world...So throwing it away will destroy anyone deeply involved in a relationship...I suggest You should find the PROBLEM and repair it and don't evn think about any BREAKUP!!...

  • You hate him? That is a pretty good sign that the relationship is not working. Despite what you WANT, you can't ignore reality. Time to end this relationship and move on. Stop torturing yourself.

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    • I can't just move on. We just recently got married. he wanted to rush things, like rush me into sex and rush me into marriage so that he can mentally lock me into a relationship with him. I gotten myself in this mess, and I guess I should have known better but it's too late now. I am married for only 1/2 a year and I don't want to have a bad reputation as the divorcee. I also don't want to just give up on love on him. Why is it so hard for me to love someone?

    • According to your comments he raped you, forced you into a relationship and basically controls your life. If that's true then you need to contact a women's shelter immediately so they can get you out of this relationship. It doesn't matter if you will be divorced, you need to be safe. This is not a good relationship nor how a relationship should be. Don't let yourself be a prisoner because you think you have no choice.

What Girls Said 3

  • I don't know all of the details of your situation. But it sounds like you need to confront him, tell him how unhappy you are and explain why. Until you're happy, he's not going to be, because you'll be miserable with him. It's a two-way street. And if you can't be happy with this guy, then regardless of religion, you need to get out. I think that every religion would support peace and happiness over constant fighting, any day. Separation might be the best option. But if you really do love him, and you're not just trying to convince yourself of that because you feel an obligation to stay married, then there must be a reason for that. First step: talk to him. You can go from there.

    I hope this helps a bit, and I hope that you find happiness wherever you end up!

    Good luck :)

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    • Thanks for your answer. I think that maybe it's me who is not loving enough. Religion wants us to be able to love everyone. When someone slaps us on one cheek we are suppose to be able to let them slap us on the other cheek. Some how my life doesn't seem that simple. I let him break hundreds of things, he continues and I am here hurt but still loving him. He's happy with me with him, he doesn't want to end our relationship. Why am I not happy with him?

    • I can't see how it would be easy to love someone who treated you that way. Don't be so hard on yourself. You seem like a very caring person, and I'm sure that you're loving enough... But he has to work to earn your love and admiration -- something that he's not currently doing. What has he done that HAS made you happy? Maybe focus on encouraging him to do those things more often, and explain how much you struggle with his less admirable characteristics?

    • Asker,U got points....Unless he have a relationship with any other women,You don't have to think about divorce.Your religion says that IF You R BONDED TOGETHER BY GOD then NO PERSON IN THIS WORLD SEPARATES YOU!! I think he has some problems that he don't want to tell you and may be its hurting him a lot...and I m so happy that whaterver is going on YOu still love him...Its just a matter of time I believe...If god bound You with him,He will make sure its bound and its a strong one. LIF's NOT EASY!!!

  • if you hate him why in the hell do you want to be with him?

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    • He wanted me to be with him so he raped me. He said if he didn't then I would have broken up with him. (he is the first I ever slept with). He then pressured me to marry him so that I couldn't get away and he could always "bother me, annoy me, boss me around" at his leisure. Plus I feel like he has so many secrets from his past that I don't like that he refuse to talk to me about. We always get into an argument about his past. He ends up breaking expensive things, and pushing me around.

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    • Spykarbro... This woman deserves to be treated with respect. RIGHT NOW. There is no reason for her to put up with this. Faith didn't stop her from getting raped, so maybe sitting around waiting for God to change things isn't the best idea. If you want to look at it that way, maybe this is a test of her values... And harmony over violence is generally the most acceptable thing to strive for, right?

    • I am not happy with the fact that she is not treated WELL!!... But have yu heard what she said?She Loves him and he loves her..and may be becoz he hurt her like this mentally and physically because he have some problem...thts not Right!!! They have to get some counseling...there can be something WE CANT SEE ,ryt?what if evrything will be alryt after his problem is cured and they will be happier than ever? and DO YOU THINK SHE WILL NOT REGRET LATER IN HER LIFE LEAVING HIM IN THIS POSITION???

  • remember why you married him in the first place

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