What would you do with a persistent ex?

My boyfriend's ex of five years keeps trying to get my boyfriend to go out to lunch with her. She left him for another man and I guess you could say I was kinda a rebound. Me and my boyfriend knew each other almost 5 years before we started to talk again. I guess you could say we had some history. Once we started talking again his ex started to blow up his phone and even stop by his dorm asking about me. One time she seen me wearing his old high school jacket and sent a text to him saying she seen me wearing it. At first I thought, okay first of all how old is this girl and just wait it out things will get better, she will get the hint that she f***ed up and leave us alone. The calls and text got so bad that he had to change his number. Since she couldn't get a hold of him via phone she e-mails him this long e-mail saying how she loves him and will fight until the day she dies to get him back. He responds telling her that he loves her and always will and that she can contact him anytime she wants behind my back. When I found out he admitted that he was talking to her..made sense why she kept texting him. He stopped talking to her for 6 months. Recently when he went home to visit his family his ex found out he was in town and stopped by his house with her family. I understand their families are friends but it was completely inappropriate. His ex's mom was even asking him why they can't just work it out. She asked him for the 5th time if he would go to lunch with her so they could catch up. He said he turned her down and mentioned me for the millionth time. He ended up calling me after she left to tell me she was at his families house for a few hours. My issue I was having was why didn't he call me while she was there. Like step out of the room and call me? I am thinking that he is being nice to her because why else would she keep trying to contact him? I honestly don't know what to do if she asks my boyfriend out again. She also has become best friends with his sister. For a while my boyfriend and his sister would talk about this girl over the phone because his ex claimed she was all depressed. He said he was worried about her. But why worry about her she is the one who cheated more than once...her fault. This girl has tried everything to get him back by trying to befriend me, becoming best friends with his sister, and pretty much waiting for him to come home or waiting for him to e-mail her back. Enough is enough what should I do if she asks him out again or contacts him? What are the signs he isn't over her?


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What Guys Said 2

  • Look dear... Its completely not in your hands to stop that girl from contacting your boyfriend.

    But yes at times when You both are going through a rough patch, it is in those times when your guy might look up to the his ex to confide in when he is not able to confide in you. It happens. So all you need to ensure is you win over him completely and never make him have second thoughts about your relationship with him. Have strong faith and belief in your love and do make your relationship strong. Don't press him hard.

    As it's said: When You love someone, Set them free. If they return back, they are meant to be yours; If they don;t, they were never meant to be yours.

    Best Wishes

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  • It seems pretty oblivious that he isn't over her and since he keeps communicating with it's going to be hard to get her out of the picture. I hate giving ultimatums but I don't see another option. I think need to let him know that it's either you or her, but he might choose her. In my eyes he's cheating on you emotionally.

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