GUYS: I wrote my ex a letter, should I give him it now or graduation?

i have a long history with my best friends brother. we dated for a year and things for awkward after we haven't talked about what happened since and I never really got closure. I wrote him this letter explaining how I did feel about him and how I hope he's happy with whatever girl comes into his life and how ill always be there for him. (I can show if you want to see)

one of my best friends (guy) said I could give it to him now and it would be good but is it more meaningful as a "goodbye" letter?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think I would give it to him now, because either he will just take it as it is and not say anything and at least he knows where you stand, or it might even open up a discussion which will give you real closure. I know with my last ex I didn't talk to him for awhile and I left him because of the way he was but I had really strong feelings for him.

    After awhile I questioned if I made the right decision and so I just talked to him once more, to see if he even changed at all, and it was obvious that he didn't change one bit which made me feel really good about the whole thing and made it easier for me to forget about him and move on.

    • Yeah the thing is if I give it to him now I feel like I will be expecting him to try and get me back or say he loved me or I don't know what. but I don't want to be back with him because he isn't good for me

      do you think if I waited it would be the same?

    • Show All
    • I know I'm not over him though and I want to be I hate hearing about anything about him and caring. the letter is more of a goodbye letter but I don't want to have to wait til then to get closure. would it be a bad idea to just say something now and ask him what went wrong between us? he practically left me for her and I never found out why because he said he was in love with me, wanted to marry me, etc. and I feel like if I knew what really happened id get closure

    • Then I would try and have a conversation with him, ask him some things you want to know to see what he says, then revise your letter and give it to him as a goodbye.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • definatly more meaningful as a goodbye letter, its saying "this is the end, so here's my final thoughts about you"

    giving it to him before he gets a new girlfriend or completely moves on shows him clearly how you feel, so doing it sooner increases the change that he'll want to talk to you

    short version, sooner you give it to him, the closer your friendship will be

    • Yeah I would definitely rather have it be meaningful, I don't want him to have time to talk to me It's better if he doesn't

      Thank you :)

  • up to you

  • Depends do you want to start chating with him now or later. Is he over you, or does he want to contact you...

    • Honestly I don't know. I don't want to talk to him now and I don't want him to be apart of my life because I know it isn't good for me but I keep wanting to give it to him so he knows how I feel/felt. since the whole thing we haven't talked about what happened and I don't know what he thinks about it all and I want him to know my side, I don't want to wait, but I feel like if I wait since I will be moving itll be less awkward and better closure?

What Girls Said 2

  • Give it to him now. Now is better than later.

  • keep your dignity burn the letter

    • not about dignity and I didn't say I love him now or anything. It is really thought out and I know its a perfect letter to give but my problem and question is when to give it

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