I have finally internalized this but how to believe it?

So the thing is never believe what a girl says they want, and to stop being a manipulative nice guy? But now the problem is actually going from a corny "nice" guy to a guy that can enjoy himself and tease girls, when he has no experience in flirting and teasing girls? Maybe someone can give me an example of playfully teasing and flirting so I can figure out what to do. Also how would a non nice guy ask a girl out and let her know that he is interested?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Just have fun all the time, do not be mean, inconsiderate, or a jerk when teasing them. If it is about something you know she is self conscious about then it is off limit.

    Be direct and ask them out making it clear it is a date. If they have given you their number or contact info they already know your interested and are expecting it. It will not bother them.

    To keep you from worrying about what your doing/saying, and from what they are thinking - do not care about the result (You will become more attractive because the way you act towards them won't be all the wrong ways that helps kill the attraction.). You will learn what you are doing right, and what you are doing wrong and can make adjustments. You will learn when they are not being receptive and you can remove yourself before they can even reject you and you will be excluding them yourself before you know it. You will learn when there is no chance they will shoot you down. When you do not care and do not expect anything it makes everything so much easier for you.

    Be yourself, have fun, be direct, and do not care about the result.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Look... it's not about not being nice. It's about not satisfying the 'demand' right away and not scaring away from everything. For example girls like to tease or to test your confidence with little jabs. In these situations you have to stay confident and not get offended. Rather just ignore it (because you don't care about her opinion) or go into the offensive. Another thing is that if a girl tells you she wants something you can't just jump and do it, bacause it won't be appreciated. If you do something for her make sure she understands it was because YOU wanted to do it not because SHE wanted it. Finally... don't let her play you. Learn how to ignore her tears (which is difficult) and always choose the rational thing to do. They do little tests all the time. A very popular one is withdrawing sex or getting angry at you for no real reason. What you have to do then is:

    1. Do not get angry at all... NEVER! Get serious, lower your voice and tell her calmly but firmly that you do not have to deal with this and that she can call you when she comes to her senses. Leave and don't call.

    2. Never do stuff just because she cries while she asks you for something. Stay rational! For example a girl will often cry and tell you how she needs a real relationship, love, needs you... Or she'll start crying when you try to break up with her for behaving like a bitch. Don't trust her just because she is crying. They know exactly what they are doing (trust me).

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  • Dude, like thecandymancan said, it's not about not being nice. If you want to be able to attract quality women into your life then you yourself have to become a quality man. Forget this whole, "How not to be a nice guy" or "How to be an asshole" BS lol. What truly attracts a woman is a man who is firm in his beliefs and has some sort of purpose in his life. You gain confidence through experiencing the world and doing things that are greater than yourself. A man who has established some sort of idea as to who he is, a man who is the captain of his own ship is seen as sexy and valiant.

    The whole definition of the "nice guy" needs to be revamped. It's not the nice guy who doesn't get the girl, but the wimpy needy man who fails when it comes to dating. Don't be needy and don't be wimpy. Date a girl who you believe will enhance your life and make your already happy life even richer.

    As for teasing her...Give her a little nickname, display your confidence and power, make it seem like you lost interest in her and then suddenly pull her back in to you. The point is to do it playfully and to not overdo it.

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  • well. you can't not be nice to a girl and expect her to like you, ya some girls may like that but most do not. be nice but don't be SUPER nice, but teasing once in a while is fine just not all the time, like maby once in the blue tease her about somthing that won't make her upset or angry. and let her know your interested by looking into her eyes when you both talk and show interest in what she is saying, nobody likes a jerk.

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