How to get through the pain of being cheated and left?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • First and foremost - time. The more time passes, the less shitty you'll feel.

    The question is rather, how to make enough time pass without succumbing to depression and becoming bitter, or worse, losing hope and wanting to harm yourself.

    There is no one-solution-fits-all answer, obviously. But judging from my personal experience (and I've been there) and from what I've observed in my friends, as well as what common sense tells me, there are certain things that will definitely help and makes things easier (or less hard, at least).

    1. Do not isolate yourself. Feeling like shit understandably makes us want to crawl under a blanket and stay there for a long time. And that's totally fine and legitimate in the immediate aftermath, for a while. But it's essential to get up again and go out and meet people. Stay social.

    2. Talk to people that you trust about your situation. They will give you all sorts of different inputs, and that's good. Hearing different perspectives will help you see things differently, especially when coming from people you care about. This will most likely also make you see the positive apsects.

    3. Distract yourself. Keep yourself busy. Focus on things that are important to you, especially things that you might have neglected because of her.

    4. Change stuff. Whatever it is. Your hair, your beard, your furniture. Anything. It can be small things. get rid of old stuff that you don't use or need anymore. This helps you move on.

    5. Break off all contact, including deleting her from all social media. Looking her up on social media will just make things harder and take longer. Do not talk to her. It will only do you more harm.

    6. Stop talking about it. I know this is a contradiction to #2, but what I mean is to eventually stop talking about it when you've said it all and everyone's told you what they had to say about it. At some point it's very important for you to stop actively discussing this topic.

    7. Focus on your anger instead of your sadness. It's natural to initially be sad and wanting her back, but eventually you'll realize that you can be glad you got rid of her. She cheated on you. She hurt you. You should be angry at her. Be angry.

    8. Last but not least, think about new girls. You don't have to rush this, but it's good to at least think about meeting someone new. Because to ultimately answer your question: to get through the pain, you need to stop looking back and start looking forward.

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What Girls Said 8

  • It takes time. Just do something to keep your mind off of It. Talk to someone about it if you want maybe that'll help, and always know your worth. It hurts like hell now but eventually you'll be happy again and find someone that is better for you. Goodluck

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  • I suggest taking some time for yourself. Being in a relationship is time consuming and now you have a lot of free time. Go out with your friends, do something you truly enjoy. Everybody has bad ends to relationships. There's somebody out there for you but for now, enjoy some time by yourself.

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    • When a guy takes time off, he loses his sense of game. He'll have tinrelearn how to court women, it's not like girls where they have lines of men asking then out. He should NOT be taking break unless he wants be old and alone

  • Just keep getting up and facing the day and trying to make the most out of it. You never know when it's going to be your last day. Eventually one day you'll wake up and it just won't hurt as much

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  • Enjoy being single! Take it as a blessing.

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  • Give it time

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  • Enjoy yourself being single and move on

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  • You aren't alone and things have a way of playing out on the side of the one who had been wronged. Realize your worth is more than being disrespected, learn from the mistakes so next time you'll know who to trust, go to the gym and work out the pain. You aren't the first and wouldn't be the last. Get some supportive Bros, give it time and then put yourself out there again. It's really hard now but maybe if you don't let this pain get the better of you, maybe you'll find someone much better than her. Be strong, keep yourself healthy and happy. Keep your heart and mind thinking and feeling postive.

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  • I've been there and been a year and i can't seem to get over it. Not to mention i can't trust a single person on this planet including my own family

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    • It gets better but you have to communicate your issues when you want to get to give more trust to the right people.

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    • Me neither

    • Damn !

What Guys Said 23

  • Change one small thing everyday.

    If your feeling hopeless and are in the stage of being in bed all day.

    The changes can be simple. Just shower, brush your teeth and put on clean clothes everyday. Dont let life become stagnant.

    Make small changes, little steps. Go for a walk every morning. Increase that walk speed, distance and duration everyday. You gotta take small steps to get back into normalcy.

    Take all the gifts, memories and stuff and either trash it or lock it away where you can't see it. Block the thot. Don't get into empty relationships. It won't help you grow, rebounds won't give you the time to self reflect. You need alone time to think and process it out of your life.

    Hang out with your buddies and make new friends and tell them NOT to talk about her. That you DO NOT want to hear about whatever the fuck the thot is doing. The animal must be kept away from your mind. If any friend breaks this rule, avoid them. You dont need that right now. It doesn't matter if they tell you she is fat af addicted to crack. She does not deserve anymore of your time.

    Pick up a hobby, learn a new language and work fucking hard to get $$$. All that negative energy must be put in constructive things. Dont let the energy destroy you. Let it destroy the bitch, but not you. You are gonna use it to become awesome. Thots not gonna sleep at night knowing what she did but you? you can't sleep at night because your too busy succeeding in life :)

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  • Understanding that you deserve better than that. Realizing that that person didn't have self-control, regardless if they felt they wanted more, they didn't handle it properly. You're young and have a lot more to learn and see in the world. Realize that even if you went through 100s of bad relationships that's only 100 out of what, 7 billion people? You'll find the right person. Don't let yourself falter because of one person's mistake.

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    • True, be strong to get through this because you deserve better. Look forward and give yourself time to heal. Be hopeful, because it's her fault not yours.

  • Keep going. Don't give up. Keep doing activities you enjoy unless they were something you used to do together. I know it sucks and hurts but time fixes everything, just remember to stay active. Don't mope around feeling depressed because then it's a slippery slope and hard to get out of.

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  • Knowing that that person wasn't for you, and you can get someone who treats you right. And it was a teaching moment, what did you learn from it? Keep moving forward 💪🏼

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  • Get up. Keep moving forward. See failure as experience.

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  • I know this might sound stupid but if you go out a fuck someone else it does make ya feel better

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  • Been there. You have to place yourself way higher than the POS that cheated on you and move on. It takes time, a lot of time but it does become easier.

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  • -Reflect on why you got rejected
    -learn from your mistake (s)
    -understand female hypergamy
    -priortize self improvement
    -dont whine like a bitch about it.

    Good luck, kid. I was once you.

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  • Breath and let yourself feel and put it into a fiscal form, workout while you break down, this will break you down in all ways but when you heal your be stronger emotionally and fiscally

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  • Find someone else who makes you happy but not someone that reminds you of that person

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  • Respect yourself more so this doesn't happen again.

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  • Find something to do. It takes time. Took me a year to get my concentration elsewhere. What helped me was cooking. Being really honest

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  • I've been going through this, it's been a few months and still weighs heavy, just work on yourself and do things to keep your mind off of it

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  • By spending the time you can think about something like sports or anything that keeps me from thinking

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  • Time is the answer to that. Nothing immediate works unless you're masking the pain. For it to go you just have to wait

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  • I don't honestly it does heal 100% best thing is talking about it tough.

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  • Fuck other girls

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  • Love is a weakness.

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  • Drugs

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  • Time

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