Should I try and move on from my ex wife?

My ex wife and I finalized our divorce last month is was something i did not want. We have two little boys and I'm just wanting my family back. I dont know what to do. Her reasons for divorcing me was because I didn't help her out enough around the house or with the kids. I made her feel unwanted alone and unloved and I was selfish and had a spending issue. I was diagnosed with depression last year in January. When she was pregnant for our oldest she was talking to another guy just texting and sending pictures this happened again a year later and I forgave her both times for it. When I was diagnosed with depression we started marriage counseling and I thought thi hs were getting better. I love her still and would do anything to have my family back. Most of the time she acts like she wants nothing to do with me. I'm doing all I can to be there for her. I miss my family so much.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes you should move on. It’s not healthy to think trying to make it work because you have children together.

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    • It's not just for my kids though. I still love her. 10 years we were together for.

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    • Well I hope you feel better soon!

    • Thank you

Most Helpful Guy

  • Do all you can to be there FOR YOUR SONS. Forget her---she was already cheating on you.

    As for your not helping out enough, were you working hard? If you did have a spending issue, own up to that, but I am surprised, usually it is her spending issue.

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    • Well it was because of my depression and I never felt like a good dad. My spending issue my counselor said that's part of depression. I did have a full time job we both did. I did other stuff though like keep the cars running good. Took out garbage and stuff.

    • After she cheated the first time that when I noticed I was feeling down and started getting depressed

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What Girls Said 1

  • i was in the same boat... its been a long time.
    I told him (my ex. husband) to leave me along for a year... but he pressured me to go to court... its over now...6 years. later.
    I didn't started dating till more than a yr. after our separateion...
    you need time to move on.
    i move on phyically, but at the end nothghing is more important than my fmaily...
    our kids are in much better place now because of me... i could have been the resentful, bitter ex. wife. i am not. i supported him and help him to work with me to raise kids in 2 separate homes...

    you are hurt now and iwll for a long time... make sure you be the better man/father to help with the boys, be there for them thats the best you can do at this point.

    you will heal, give yourself time.

    he is dating the 3rd woman. this one i like.. similar value in money, eduactoin, health... etc...

    i am also dating, second boyfriend... also similar value...

    so to me, these are more important than trying to fix a marriage that he doeesn't want.
    i will never forgive him for breaking up the family and the maaiage... but i am learning to focuse on co partning and share a property together...
    we were like best friends and still talk like one in very very good terms... someimes still talk silly...
    do i like this dynamic of these bf/gf situations? no... but i have no choice...

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What Guys Said 3

  • No matter how much you love her and want her, if she doesn't want you. . . there is never going to be a relationship. Move forward.

    Breaking up: you may want to die. . . but you won't, so do yourself a favor and deal with it! ↗

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  • I feel you my friend , you just go and promise her that you will change into a better person

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    • I've tried that so many times. She tells me we will never be together again. It is killing me

    • You tried giving flowers or gifts

    • Yes I have and she says I dont have to get her anything or do stuff like that or she dont want me to do that stuff

  • Maybe it’s not meant to be? I’ve never been married and honestly don’t plan on it, but I know many marriages just don’t work out. I guess that’s just life. Maybe just focus on you and your kids for a bit, be the best dad you can be, and the right women will come along eventually. Best of luck!

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    • I'm trying my best. Just hard I miss her so much..

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