My anger has possibly ruined my relationship?

I got mad as my girlfriend was going on holiday and didn't want to be lonely. I seem to have a issue with abandonment as my life hasn't been easy and anytime someone wants to leave eg go home for the night i get upset or mad. I've said some horrible stuff that i didn't mean. I love her to bits but its not the first time I've fliped. I would never physically hurt her its verbally. I've went and found some help counselling that hopfully will help me with this issue. Problem is that she won't talk to me she's out on a girls holiday lots of alcohol and i have a feeling she's not gonna forgive me. I've explained everything but she's having non of it. What should i do?
My anger has possibly ruined my relationship?
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