Obsessing about an ex from a while.....and its my own damn fault

There was a girl I date about a year ago for a few months. Long story but she wasn't that in to me and it didn't work out.

She went through 2 other bfs and now is on a third since. They got engaged in a few weeks. I know this all from a FB account. It's like she is in and out of luck in 5 mins.

I text her occasionally and she texts back. We talk about getting together to get some clothes or a workout.

Truth is I'm obsessing about her. Maybe its because we never had sex (was close twice). Maybe because she was special for some reason. Maybe I'm pissed off and want revenge.

I check her out on FB daily. I got to stop this sh*t. But it's an addiction.

I dated two other girls in the last year. I also dated some others. But I'm single during the holidays and I feel myself getting depressed. Last year I got on meds for a little while but got off them.

I got to be a man and move on. But I keep self sabotaging myself. I got more important things to worry about this. This addiction of thinking about her is HOLDING ME BACK.

But I can't stop checking her out on fb.

Has anybody ever been in this situation?

Updates:
hey everybody I realized a made a TON of typos above. Sorry, my bad.



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Most Helpful Girl

  • Everybody wants what they can't have.. That's part of the problem.

    Move on. I know it's easier said than done, but this girl is not a nester. She will likely not last long with her fiancee, so the upside for you is that you might have a shot later on down the line.

    Depression and compulsive behavior go hand in hand. You are probably compulsively checking FB because you feel you want information and the information will give you control of the situation. Unfortunately, the opposite is happening... The more you log on, the less control you have. So for now, delete her from your FB friends list OR go on a FB diet and don't log on at all.

    The addiction of thinking of her is deliberate, probably so you don't have to think of those other things. You're going to have to train your mind to flip the switch and make her less of a priority. That's the only way you're going to get past this.

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    • very good answer, thanks

    • I deleted her from FB.

    • That's a good start. Things should get a little easier now. Just take it one day at a time.

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What Guys Said 2

  • It happens mate, you can feel like you're still involved in a persons life by following what they're up to. I split up with a girl a few days ago and the temptation to see what she's up to is there. If you take nothing else on board please do this next thing. Delete her from your facebook friends. If you aren't able to stop yourself from looking, take it away at the source. Find other things to do, get into sport or study for something. Get your mind active and thinking of other things.

    If this girl is engaged to somebody she has only known for a few weeks I'd say she's very fickle. You really don't need that and, although it's easy to say, there are other girls out there for you.

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  • I used to when I got rejected in highschool. Best thing I did was force myself to do other things for I would be thinking about her all the time.

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