"Friendship" or Move on?

Dated this girl for a couple of months; things were great until she just dropped the bomb on me. She's insecure and thought I'd cheat on her (several of her exes have), and no matter how much I threw in for her during the relationship, it wasn't enough.

Regardless, she wanted to be "friends" since she believed we understood each other so well. I don't get this at all--how can I just be friends after being dumped like that?

It's been a month since the break-up and I've gotten over her mostly. Do I go back for the friendship offer she had or do I take her out of my life completely (ie, delete off FB, delete message history, throw out gifts, photos, everything)?

  • Become friends
    Vote A
  • Toss everything and move on
    Vote B
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Forgot to add: I can't completely rule out of the possibility of some old feelings returning if I hang out with her. We don't have any mutual friends so it'd pretty much be her and I alone if we chill.
Thanks for the votes and input guys. I'll give myself a little more time before befriending her again.

On another note, anyone notice the clear division on the poll?


Most Helpful Girl

  • If you've gotten over her mostly then why the need to delete her completely out of your life? I say you just leave it be as it is. The line "let's just be friends" usually is used for damage control and to make the break up seem not so bad and the person who is doing the break up not so much of a terrible person. If she hasn't made an effort to be your friend then leave it be especially since if you guys do hang out there's a chance you might just put yourself into a bad situation and gain feelings for her again. Its never a good idea to put yourself in a situation that may hurt you especially if the other person won't feel the same way.


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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • It really depends on what you think you can handle. It is usually harder for the person who was broken up with to want to be freinds. Like with me, I can't be freinds with my last ex because he broke up with me and I still have some feelings. for him From a girls stand who broke up with her boyfreind though, I wish my old ex wanted to be my freind but understand he cant. If you are almost over her, there is no reason to delete her off facebook and cut all ties with her. It might help you get completely over her though if you got rid of any romatic gifts, pcitures you guys had from when you wer edatenig. You can chat and hang out in small doses. Then maybe when you find someone else or more time has passes, you two could truly just be freinds

  • do you want to be her friend? if not, then just delete her


What Guys Said 1

  • Stop talking to her. The whole "lets be friends" thing is to ease off of you slowly while she eventually finds someone else KNOWING how you still feel about her, giving you a front row seat. All you will be is an emotional tampon when she has issues nothing more, and she will be secretly laughing her ass off because she gets to have a sense on commitment from you without having to commit to you. It's not your obligation to give her what she wants. Stop all communication. Stop chasing her. Delete her from everything. Go out and start dating other girls asap. Live your life and have fun. The friendship ended when you two got together. Having a "friendship" with her now will just cause you misery, heartache, false hope of getting back together, and a delay of you moving on. Move on.


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