Why does being cheated on still hurt?

I found out about 7 months ago that my boyfriend of 1.5 years was cheating on me. I’m not sure when it started, but, I’d say he started flirting with other girls around 7 or 8 months of dating. He was always doing shading things online and it’d always upset me/make me feel insecure. When I found out he cheated, he told me he did it because I made him miserable by always being insecure and accusing him of being unfaithful (it truly seemed he was at times/or wanted to be). Anyways. It has been 7 months now. i am dating a new guy who treats me really well. But, the pain of being cheated on and humiliated is still there. And the last time we talked which was months ago, my ex said some hurtful things to me, basically telling me that i probably control my new bf/am insecure with him, and that it’s my fault my ex cheated on me (also that my ex can see why my ex before him cheated on me and abused me). So, I blocked my ex for good. But, I am still so hurt.
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With my new boyfriend, I am never insecure or accusatory because he doesn’t do things to make me feel that way. He makes me feel special and like he is committed to me. My ex never did that and it made me feel so insecure and I’d communicate it and he’d call me controlling.
Why does being cheated on still hurt?
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