I Think It's Time To Let Go, What Do You Think?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 9 months, during that whole 9 months, he has lied about being married and having more kids than what he has and the reason he said he lied about his marriage is because he didn't want to loose me because they are separated, and he lied about his kids because I told him I don't want a man with a lot of kids when we 1st started dating but I found out he has 3 opposed to 1. Now here we are at a 9 month mark and I still have not met his kids, we never go anywhere except to eat, and when we do he hardly pays for me.

Im a single mother so life is a struggle for me and when I confide in him it seems like he is not concerned because he doesn't give any feedback or offer ways to help me. I don't know maybe I look for him to bail me out sometimes because he has a lot of money and I know this because he has two brothers that are in jail and sends them each $100 bucks a week and he loans money to his family and kids mothers, but sometimes I feel after he does all that for everybody else, there is nothing left for me. I'm very generous even tho I don't have a lot of money I still do little things for him but to show him that I care. but I don't get the same back, he didn't even do anything for me on my b-day. As a matter of fact he up and went to Vegas on my b-day because his son who he initially did not tell me about b-day was the day after mine so he wen to Vegas to see him which is understandable but he didn't even tell me. I'm making plans to be with him on my day but he just left me at home by alone, that really hurt me.

I love him but I'm starting to feel like we are working towards nothing. I have a kid so why can't our kids play together? he has met my son and my son loves him. I bring the idea of play dates up all the time but he just changes the subject, he knows that I'm struggling but continues to let me struggle even while he helps everyone else. He still has not filed for a divorce, we don't make any plans together, we don't go anywhere we just don't do anything and I'm becoming very unhappy... he has a lot of baggage what are your thoughts?


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  • My heart goes out to you luv. Do you know how he feels about the divorce? Perhaps there are some feelings or problems or issues that he has in hand but haven't told you about it.

    This is a tough call because I don't know much about him. I understand where you are coming from: he hasn't treated you quite well (action does speak louder than words) and he definitely has his interest in his family more than you. If you feel that you are more liberated, happier without him, by all means call this off. If not, observe whether he's in the mood to have a discussion with you. If yes, talk to him about how you feel about the way he treated you, and try to understand and get a feel of what's going through his mind. But be prepared he may recoil or not react really well. If he's not interested to even discuss with you, I think you have your answers.

    Sorry I'm no expert in this, but I hope this provides any form of help to you. Best of luck x

    • Thank you for your response I agree totally. I am going to have a talk with him. I don't think I want to do this any more he is too selfish and I feel sad more than I feel happy. However, I appreciate your respectful and excellent advice! Happy Holidays

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