What to do when the ex contacts you?

Why does an ex contact you after months of NC? Nothing more than small talk texting but what is the point? Friendship/ Reunion?

I do have feelings for her but I'm wary to stir anything up again particularly when I don't know the reason for her making contact. Should I wait this out and see if she makes contact again or does she expect me to make the next move?

I'm not sure what I want from her as it has taken me the past 2 months to feel better about everything and I don't want to set myself up for a fall. But then I also don't want to break down the opportunity of anything happening in the future if their is a shot. In short if anything was to happen again I would have to be sure she is committed. It's all pretty confusing!

A quick background. We dated on/off for 4 months. She left state for college. We split because of the distance and because she seemed more interested in college life. So no cheating/ arguing but I didn't feel I was that important in her priorities.


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What Girls Said 2

  • She probably misses you which is why she would contact you. It doesn't mean that she wants to get back together. If the reasons for the break up are still there, then you can't hope to get back together. Since you say you have been feeling better and moving on, I suggest you continue to move on and ignore her, because this will just set you back.

  • Guys need to hear this too. "she's just not that into you." If you were not her priority before, what makes you think you will be now that she is even further away? I think she might be lonely and wants to hear from someone familiar. It's not easy moving to a new place with new people. One thing I learned the HARD WAY, you cannot live for a future. If someone does not want you NOw, chances are they won't want you later either. I had a situation that I did not want to ruin a shot in the future and we dated for 5 years. Guess what happend 5 years later of "not wanting to ruin a shot?" She was still not ready to be with me. Don't settle for someone that does not make you a priority and you are only an option for "maybe" later...Trust me...not a good way to live.

    • Actually she only contacted me since she got back into town so I guess it's the familiarity of our this place. But I get what your saying and have been steadily moving on without her. I've stuck to my guns and had NC so I really wasn't expecting to hear from her. It's just frustrating to hear from her as it's brought back old feelings and is selfish to do particularly when she is seeing someone else.

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