I must be now the worst person ever right?

I got cheated on by my fiance. We were together for 6 years and engaged for 5 months.

My reaction upon finding out his affair (which has been going for almost 2 years):
- Backhanded him, literally knocking his glasses off him.
- Throwing all his stuff outside.
- Throwing several of our pictures against the wall.
- Throwing a nonstoppable verbal ranting along with saying ''I never want to see you again''.
- Telling everyone on fb.

Though I'm never gonna get back with him, I know the 1st on the list was clearly wrong. No excuse. So I must be one of the worst person right? Thing is most of our mutual friends (even a couple themselves) saying ''he deserved it'' are the same ones that would have reacted differently if tables were turned. My own ex fiance himself thinks it was deserved too. I think not. I think a throwing a cheater to the curb was enough.
Updates:
by the way this is coming from a once quiet, shy girl that never fought anyone and rarely argues.

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Yes, it was wrong to hit him. He could rightfully press assault and battery charges. But it was also perfectly understandable for you to do so. If he went to the authorities, he would be the biggest douche in the world on top of being a cheater.

    If the tables were turned (you cheated and he hit you) the principle would be the same. But, unless you’re both unusual for your sex, he’s probably larger and stronger and will do considerably more damage to you. Your swing at him was probably more humiliating than seriously threatening. And that’s why everyone, including him, thinks he deserved it. If the tables were turned, his swing at you might put you in the hospital. Force matters.

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  • U did OK, just as anynody would. Telling everybody isn't a good idea though as these things are private.

    Being cheated sux, it's like you're engaged to a petty criminal. The guy obviously has no clue how to do that. So don't mess with petty criminals, go for a great black ninja.

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    • Ironically I used to be a quiet, shy girl (I can still be sometimes) and never fought anyone. I'm also the type to rarely argue. That was very out of my character.

    • No worries, it was OK. But don't think there are other types of guys, srsly

Most Helpful Girl

  • You guys were together 6 years, engaged 5 months and he's been cheating for close to two years.
    Giving him a backhand was wrong but my opinion he's lucky you didn't kick him in the balls as well. I would bet at least 75 out of 100 girls would have reacted the same way so NO you're not even close to being the worst person ever.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 8

  • In theory it's wrong, yes, but it's such a small thing that it doesn't matter at all. What he did was way worse than your whole list.

    But if you still feel bad about it, you can always repent by doing a good deed. It's completely uncalled for and over the top, but it should soothe your conscience. Help at a local homeless shelter, organise an event for the young, visit an animal shelter, clean the city, whatever.

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  • well, of all the things you did, the first one is probably the only thing that allowed him to experience any real pain of sorts. so since you were put through pain, more so than a slap to the face, why would it not be tolerated.

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  • Having you heart ripped out of your chest is painful and we react accordingly.. Yes, we must never resort to hitting. EVER. But I publishes pictures they took and left on a simm card to face book... I have not taken them down 2 years later... I am totally non violent, calm, level headed and always though myself as fair to all... but she ripped my heart out.. sh efucked my friend..

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  • Oh my god I love you.

    Naw, he deserved the backhand. I'm all for equality of the sexes, but instinctively I just feel no sympathy for that asshole. If you were going to hit just one person in your whole life, that was the right time to do it.

    Anyways, I'm so sorry this dick shattered your trust and broke your relationship apart. Distance yourself from him as much as you can and go find something you love doing and throw yourself into it. Like go hiking a shitload, or learn Spanish or learn to dance or something.

    Okay, ideally you wouldn't have hit him, I agree, and if it'd been the other way around I'd be more aggravated about it, and I get that I shouldn't be, but I think that's mostly because the dynamics of abuse in a relationship usually fall along gender lines and that's not okay. This obviously isn't abuse, it's a gut reaction and you really shouldn't feel THAT bad about it.

    Certainly don't apologize. Just forget that low-life.

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  • Yes, people would have reacted differently if the tables were turned. However he still deserved it, a cheating woman would have deserved it too even if it's unacceptable.

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  • You are one badass bitch! DAMN! You are a straight-up, no-bullshit BADASS BITCH! Any man who catches you and treats you right will have found a treasure from heaven.

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    • The irony is this is coming from a quiet, shy girl. I've never gotten into a fight with anyone in my life and rarely ever argue.

    • I once told my wife that the biggest bombs have the longest fuses. She got VERY quiet for a while.

  • No you are not. I'm sorry that happened to you.

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    • Thank you but imagine if tables were flipped, the guy would still get criticized for his lack of self-control.
      I'm going single for a while at this moment.

  • I think it's deserved. Don't beat yourself up over it.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I mean, that is technically assault. But that was incredibly shitty of him and I'm very sorry

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  • Just move on

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    • This is what I'm doing now. All that happened this past Saturday.

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