How do I break up with my boyfriend in a calm way?

i've only been with my boyfriend for seven months but we just jumped into a relationship to quickly, and now everything's fallen apart. And everything between us has gotten from bad to worse, I asked to break up but he doesn't want to. he doesn't understand the situation clearly of how easier things would be if we just went our separate ways. So how will it be easy to tell him that he would be happier moving on?

we moved into the relationship too fast by moving in with each other to save more for college. and the other reason I think would be best for him to move on to be happier is that I feel like he isn't happy being with me, I just feel this most days.


Most Helpful Guy

  • After the Updates, did you ask him about being happy with you or not? If not, you should ask him because you might find answer that is opposite to your feelings. Try to do new things together try to change your routine to get his love shared with you.

    I think moving in together is not that quickly especially you had the chance to live your life with someone who would like to help in to save for the college. I guess he is a good man and you don't have to rush in breaking up with him.

    If you jumped into a relationship very quickly and in something he do respect which is saving money I guess you didn't rush yet, what I know about getting so quickly into a relationship is that you had sex without getting to know each other. but if what you rushed in is something respectful to him and to you I guess you have a good guy because you knew how to communicate at the beginning so keep on moving and ask him from time to time to share his feelings with you.

    Don't rush, try to work it out and I wish you a good life, I knew now why he doesn't want to break up with you HE LOVES YOU and HE IS HAPPY HAVING YOU BESIDE HIM.

    Best wishes :D


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Guys don't let go very fast and I have to admit when they find a love they stick to it for a lot of reasons.

    About how to break up in a calm way. you have first to understand the situation very clearly meaning you said that " And everything between us has gotten from bad to worse" and you have to know what is getting worse WORTH breaking up or what is the reason for breaking up?

    You have first to tell him a LOGICAL reason while talking. first get him in a calm place and try to describe how you feel towards this relation and tell him to wait until you finish, after that tell him why do you want to break up with him and how will it look like after breaking up with him. if he told you NO without any reason and he didn't want to ask him of his point of view, if he didn't tell you then he doesn't deserve you.

    Also, try to understand his point of view and listen to him, and if he told you reasons stronger than what you said, you have to reconsider his point of you and try to work this relation up. because you may be trying to run away from fears you have toward a relation, just consider his point.

    Finally, you have to consider getting in a relationship with him so quickly why did that happen? I guess you should first try to slow down your relation to work this out if you would like to continue.

    I hope my answer was useful.


What Girls Said 1

  • You're a caring person who wants to put effort in breaking up in a good way. What stood out for me was that you write at the end that you want to tell him he would be happier moving on. Is that really true? Sometimes we think we know what's best for others but can we really know what's best for someone else? Why not tell him that you'd be happier if you'd moved on. There's little information in this email but I'm just wondering if you're too indirect and that's why he doesn't understand it. If he doesn't want to break up, his feelings will be hurt. There's nothing you can do about that and it's not something you have to feel guilty about. If he's a man he knows how to deal with his feelings.


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