What should my next move be?

I've been broken up from my ex for a little over a month now. Been doing no contact after getting advice on here. My ex has texted me a few times but I feel like it's almost making things worse because it just always ends with him saying he needs space or whatever. Then I heard that you should agree with the break up by sending them a message or whatever saying you're sorry for how you reacted but you agree with the breakup now and think it was for the best. First I want to know if you think that actually is a good move? Do you think that will make him want me back? And also if I should do that when should I send the message? I feel like it should be after we haven't talked for a while but then he ends up texting me like I said. So confused


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Did you initiate the break up?

    If you did, I wouldn't say "sorry for how I reacted," as it would show vulnerability and make it seem like you want to get back with him. I'm having a little trouble following though... do you want to get back together? Because I'm understanding that you don't... I suppose I'm slightly loss as to how he always ends up saying he needs space... as if you were asking him to go back to your or something. Clarify please?

    Regardless, you'll need to figure out what you want for sure, whether you want to be with him, or not. If you do, well maybe someone else can offer some advise. If not, perhaps he's wanting to see if you've moved on; as if to say he has you under his thumb. Is he making any attempts to talk to other girls or what not? Does he ever message you in ways where he seems to bring up the thought of going out again or are they just plain random?

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    • He broke up with me. But there was never really closure. It was always I need space etc when I brought up possibly getting back together. So yes I do want to get back together. And I really have no clue if he is talking to other girls. He is new to this city if that helps? It's been more random lately but there was a time when he said what happened between us was sad as if he was regretting it? I don't know...

    • Ok, well you're not going to make things work with agreeing to saying "I agreed with the break" and yada, yada, yada... Mind games aren't always a brilliant idea (honestly they never are). It does't seem he's interested, though, in getting back together with that comment and with not clear initiative to try the relationship again. Some guys also text because they don't want to seem to be the villain for breaking up. Or rebound purposes or even wanting to see that you're not happy if he isn't.

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What Guys Said 1

  • you can try to get over him cause he seems to be getting over you.

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What Girls Said 1

  • If he's texting you try to base your answers on what he is texting. Is he texting saying he misses you etc?

    Personally I'm not sure I agree with the statement that you should agree with the break up he may then think you do actually agree and how will he know you miss him? I'm not a lover of all these games I just like to be straight up with my feelings - if you're not you might miss your chance of a reconcilliation..

    I think some guys need to be told straight up how you're feeling maybe a guy could give their opinion on this - do you like playing games or would you prefer to be told how a girl is feeling?

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    • I have told him how I feel though and he just said he can't be with me 'right now'. And what if I said something along the lines of I agree with the breakup because it wasn't the right time for us. Cause that makes it seem like I still have some interest for the future? Do you think that's better or I should just leave it?

    • leave it, leave it, LEAVE IT! He does not know what he wants, you don't need someone like that in your life, BUT if you do want him back just totally ignore him, don't EVER bring up getting back with him, somehow let him know u;ve already moved on and dating someone else (Do actually date someone new) but don't tell him directly, don't contact him in any way AT ALL! he'll one day remember you and know that uve moved on and he'd be dieing to know who your seeing and what uve been up to! GOODLUCK BABE! :)

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