What should I do, My friend just told me she slept with my ex boyfriend?

Yesterday we went out to eat and she just couldn't keep it a secret anymore and so she told me that she had slept with my ex and I felt terrible, she apologized for what she did and I honestly don't know what to do? Should I still have her as a friend?

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Well he was an ex. Technically, not much you can do. How ex was he and how much were you into him? How clear was it to her he was off limits (If she had to confess to you then obviously she knew you would object). Certainly the amount of confidence you can put in her has to be reevaluated. Also to consider is whether you are going to have enforced interactions-is she a work friend? Club friend? School friend? Old Friend? Part of a group you belong to? Do you live in a small town? Completely declaring war, even a Cold War will make all those things uncomfortable for everyone, yourself included. I think reevaluation of your friendship is in order but if you break all ties or create an enemy of her these things might be affected

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  • Hmm... It depends how serious uou were with that boyfriend?
    I'm trying to relate to it as if one of my guy friends told me he slept with my ex-wife.
    I wouldn't get mad, but I would think that he really doesn't give a shit about me and either does she and now I'm not ever going back to her because everything is weird now.
    I can't blame them for fucking because they obviously wanted to, but they definitely don't have any respect for me really and didn't care if it hurt me.. Not to mention now my friend is dumping this on me to get it off of his chest. Now he feels relieved and I feel like shit.
    I'd probably very calmly distance myself from both of them and move on with my life.
    That's just me though.
    Good luck.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • That's really up to you. Can you actually forgive her and move on?

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 8

  • Yes, you most certainly should keep this girl as your friend. Be happy for her and encourage her to keep sleeping with your ex. H is just trying to get at you by using your friend like that - she may not even realize that he was just using her. If you want your girlfriend to sleep with him - and really mean it when you tell her to. He will find out that you wanted your girlfriend to keep having sex with him. So he didn't hurt your feelings by having sex with your friend - ( I know that it must really have hurt you badly to hear that from your girlfriend --- She was used by your ex. A trick a guy will do to his ex girlfriend. Hunt one of her girlfriends and do whatever it takes to get her in bed. To show his ex girlfriend that she wasn't good enough for him and that he had his eye on one of her girlfriends at the same time he was dating her - If he can ruin one of your friendships also, that is another win for him. He could care less about your girlfriends feelings. But guys will use the girlfriends of their ex to hurt them even more. Then dump them also.

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  • Whether you keep her as a friend is your decision. Is there an understanding among your friends that exes are off limits to others? Did she break the understanding? Can you trust her to act properly towards you? Do you think she targeted your ex simply because he is your ex?

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  • I would say it's up to you. They are ex's for a reason and i doubt you'd care, unless he broke up with you and you still have feelings for him. It certainly isn't cool of your friend to sleep with him without letting you know first. Even less cool if it was during the time when you dated. Personally i'd just forgive her if it was afterwards

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  • Was it while you were still together? She must feel pretty bad about it if she's told you, she could probably have left this alone and never have it be an issue but she wants to be honest with you. What you do with that is up you your feelings are yours.

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  • i think you tell her that it really hurt but that you can forgive it... or were you with the guy when she slept with him?

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  • Sure you should keep her as a friend.
    Its ur EX, not ur husband.

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  • Since he is an EX boyfriend, you should wish her luck!

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  • Well put yourself in her shoes had this been you that done this w her ex. How would you feel? He’s an ex for a reason, whatever the reasons was obviously was good enough to break up. Now if he dumped you cause he wasn’t into you anymore than that would be a different. If he’s your ex he’s free game. I know the whole deal w ex’s and not sleeping w each other’s ex.

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What Girls Said 3

  • get new friends there kid

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  • Make your friend your ex friend.

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  • Well, if he is your ex should be ok. Just tell her and then you probably ok after some time.

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