I keep comparing everything to my ex, why?

There is no doubt that my ex and I ARE NOT getting back together :(. so, I've gone back on the same dating site where I met him. problem is, I keep comparing every body to him. When someone emails me, I think "oh, Matt would've done this." or "matt and I had a very comfortable conversation". and so forth. I know its not healthy to think that every guy is goign to do and say the things my ex says, so why can't I give these guys a chance instead of thinking of my ex? I am still in love with my ex, but I know we will never be together again. he has made it very clear. so I want to move on.


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  • Getting over someone takes time and lots of it. It can take months and sometimes years if you really loved them. It is natural to compare your ex to other guys in every way if you are not over them. Moving on is not easy and yes dating someone new and getting "back out there" can certainly help...but if you haven't learnt to be happy alone and within yourself and still want your ex, are you really ready for a new relationship...

    As much as it hurts it is a blessing your ex has made it clear you won't get back together, this certainly helps in moving on. If you REALLY want to move on something that has helped me in the past was to burn of throw away all reminders of him, delete phone number and block them on facebook or other. Everytime you see/hear something about them it opens the wound right back up.

    The future is not ours to see and sometimes the bet wishes are those that don't come true. but keep taking baby steps forward and why not say to yourself you'll take a chance on a casual date with 10 guys on the site? Who knows, one of them may just be what you need right now. And try and remember Matt's BAD points when comparing...like WOW this guy is very XYZ Matt was never like that". Best wishes and hope you find happiness xo


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