What to do about ex girlfriend? Why is she doing this?

So my ex girlfriend and I broke up almost two months ago because her family is going through a divorce and she doesn't have time for a relationship right now. She said I did nothing wrong and that I am truly amazing and the best boyfriend she has had. WE dated for two months. Before me she was in a relationship for two years with her previous boyfriend. He cheated on her and treated her poorly. I don't know if I was the rebound of if she has feelings for her ex boyfriend again. I asked her and she got kind of defensive saying "my business is mine now, and yours is yours".

I still can't get over her. It is probably because I live a couple doors down from her and usually see her everyday. I love this girl and want her back but don't know what to do. She said she isn't ready for a relationship right now and part of me believes her, but she talks to a lot of different guys lately and it's making me feel like a thing of the past. I feel like I am getting no recognition now. So how do I get her back? I have been trying to disappear and haven't made any attempts at talking to her for the past week and I think I'm going to continue with that. The only thing I'm worried about is that if I continue with not talking with her that she is going to talk to other guys instead of me and lose interest. So how should I go about getting her back?

Also she told me that she wants to move past all this and be friends. I don't want a friendship. It's a relationship or nothing for me. She says she wants it to not be awkward between us. The other day however I was talking to some girls and she walked by with her friends and I said "hey what's up" and as soon as she made eye contact with me she turned to talk with her friend and then left and made the whole experience awkward. I don't know why she acted like that when she was the one who wanted to be friends without awkwardness.

Even though its not true, I feel like there isn't another girl out there for me. I don't want anyone else at the moment. But I don't want to put my heart out there again just to get crushed again.

I'm still confused and in love with this girl and I want her back more than anything. I have my days where I feel good and think I'm over her but then I dream about her and then think about her and then its hard for me once again. What do I do to get this girl back and make her miss me again. Even if she is talking to other guys or has feelings for her ex boyfriend again?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • NEVER talk to this girl again. She is trying to have her cake and eat it too. If she was so good to you, she would still be with you and not let anything else get in the way. She can spend time with other guys and friends, but when it comes to you she ignores you and you are this good guy? That's a load of crap! You are worried about her losing interest? Well I got news for you, she already has lost interest in you. She gave you false hope. She is doing what she wants, and you fell for it by her letting you off easy and offering you "friendship" thinking that it will keep you around and for her to have you on her terms. Are you willing to wait months or years for this girl when it's not even guaranteed to get her back?!?! She is going to talk to other guys because that's what she wants to do, and many women will do it no matter what. When she said about it being "awkward", she was talking about for her, not for you. Since she KNOWS how you feel about her, you have lost all of your advantages. She has all the power and control. She has you chasing her, and it has her laughing her ass off. You have to move on asap. Ignore her at all costs. Stop all communication with her. Don't put your time trying to get someone back that pushed you away to easily. Don't fall for the road runner coyote experience that many guys go through. Move on and start dating other girls. You feel like there isn't another girl out there for you, but how would you know unless you try. This girl has shown her true colors when it comes to you, so don't give her any respect because she doesn't deserve it.

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    • Why does it seem like girls move on so quick? I mean we broke up a month and a half ago and she already is talking with a ton of guys. Some she acts flirty with (even though she said she does not want a relationship) I mean how is that after a breakup for a girl she has a ton of guys lined up and then most guys are left with nothing. I mean I am talking to girls but nothing really flirty. I just feel like I did everything write and I still get screwed over in the end. I feel like the bad guy

    • It's because guys are always chasing girls no matter what. Even if the girl doesn't like the guy after her, she will still enjoy the attention that she gets from him. Guys are left with nothing most of the time because guys throw away their chances. Guys are not chased like girls are, so it's good to have some girls on the side just in case. Not to cheat, but to have in case a girl leaves you. Some girls move on so quick because it's their nature, and deep down they only care about themselfs.

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What Girls Said 1

  • - Why is she doing this?

    Sounds like she knows you are good for her, but craves what is bad for her.

    - Why does it seem like girls move on so quick?

    Girls are individuals too, not a homogeneous group. I have a hard time getting over breakups too, generally take one to two years for me to heal myself to the point of being able to go on dates again, wish someone would feel this way about me.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I think she's trying to say no... I've went through an oddly similar situation lately. Unfortunately for me it has panned out that she doesn't want to be with me. So perhaps that is clouding my judgement of this situation.

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  • I am going through a very similar situation right now. I agree with the other answer, it sounds like she is trying to say she's not interested but she's trying to do it in a nice way so as not to hurt your feelings. I've begun to realize that my ex pretty much did the same thing. Sorry man, I feel your pain.

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    • she said she was so happy with me and it showed so I don't understand how she could lose interest.

      She said "this isn't the end forever" it gave me hope

    • Yeah, I mean maybe your situation is different. Don't give up hope, but I'm also saying don't just sit around counting on a reunion. My ex said the exact same things to me, and she seemed really happy until the day we broke up, but I think that she was just trying to soften the blow for me because she knew I had a brutal breakup about a year ago. Maybe your situation is different, but if you keep planning and hoping for an eventual reunion, you will be disappointed if one never materializes

    • yeah I know. Its just hard for me to understand. I mean I did everything right. I treated her great and with respect. Our chemistry was amazing and we never fought. But in the end I feel betrayed and like the bad guy.

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