Help. My heart can't move on?

I asked out my crush of two years a month ago and she turned me down. However she didn't say she's not interested but kept giving excuses like "let me check my schedule". If I send a text she'll respond a couple of times and then say "she's busy and has to go". I know she's rejecting me and I'm trying to move on but it's been a month and I think about her constantly. I'm not blaming her because I know she's trying to be nice about it, but by letting me down easy my mind knows she's not interested but my heart is holding out hope for a miracle. I keep thinking she may call or if I give her a little more time she may change her mind. I've been getting out and trying to meet new people but my heart can't move on. How do I get over her if I never got closure?


Most Helpful Girl

  • you did get closure but she didn't want confrontation. She cares about you as a friend and she turned you down because she's not interested hun, it doesn't get much more closed than that. its obvious, if she was interested she would say she's interested.

    move on, don't talk to her for awhile take some space and don't make it awkward just get busy. take times do things for you. go out with your other friends, pick up a hobby, work out at the gym, do whatever you need to do to better yourself. if a girl doesn't like you don't take it as such a rejection just think of it as you both don't share the same things in common and you don't need to change for anyone. you are wonderful just the way you are (as long as you're not abusive, mean, or a murder I mean_. but seriously take time and just find you.

    stop worrying about her (I know easier said than done) but take time to focus on you and everything else will fall into place. just delete her number for now... or just don't call it or text. don't obsess over her not wanting to date you, delete her on fb for awhile. or even if you want just text her one last time and say hey look I know you're not interested but I've liked you for a really long time and I appreciate the way you turned me down but I jsut wanted to let you know until I get over you we can't be friends. this has nothing to do with you and everything to do with me.

    trust me time will help, finding things to do will help and believe me when I say this to you... there is someone great out there waiting for you but you have to be completely open to that possibility and right now you just arent.

    Cheer up dear! It does get better I promise!

    • Problem is she's got a reputation of being insecure and turning down guys and then later telling her friends she regrets it. Also like another commenter said maybe if I don't contact her she'll miss me and call. I appreciate their optimism but I don't want to wait around praying she may change her mind. It hurts too much. I wish all women had the confidence you seem to have. It would make things clearer. Maybe I should send her a last text and make it easy for both of us "Reply 1 for NO THANKS"

    • Show All
    • Thanks. I'll send her the one last text and let that be the end of it. I think if I go into sending it with the mentality that it's the last it will help me move on.

    • thats good! lifes your one chance to be honest, do everything you want to do (within reason), live with no regrets, and have an absolutely amazing time doing it! so whatever else happens is whatever else happens you were open you were honest... live life now! hey so what it wasn't meant to be that just means there's someone for it meant to be with! =)

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What Girls Said 1

  • maybe you should stop texting her and calling her then may she will miss you and want you more maybe she will even ask you out

    • I hope that's the case, but that's what's making this hard. I want to give up this hope so I can move on.

What Guys Said 3

  • I think everyone has been there. you're hanging on to hope when there is none. sorry to sound cold.

    the way to get over one girl/guy is to find another. that's the best way. also out of site, out of mind. you keep thinking about her and hoping it will work out. that's just dragging the pain on.

    the best thing you can do is just cut her off completely, don't call, talk, text, nothing. I know it's hard but you're just going to drag the pain on otherwise.

    • Yeah it's like my rational mind knows there's no hope but the heart thinks there's a chance. That's why I decided to just send one last text. It's almost like goading her into saying "No chance" so that I can be certain and move on. I've been getting out and just talking to other people which has helped a little. I know it takes time. I was looking for ways to try and cut it out quicker.

  • She did turn you down, she was just saying that cause she wanted to let you down softly, just move on she doesn't see you other then a friend

    • You know she turned me down, she knows she turned me down, and my brain knows she turned me down. But my heart won't give up until she says so in a direct way. I mentioned to another commenter that she has a reputation as being wishy-washy and knowing this, my heart thinks there's always a chance. She's no ordinary girl. I've thought of only her for 2 years. So I feel like I've got to do something extra to make me forget her and move on. Know how to erase memories?

    • Doing other activities with friends will help, thinking too much will just make things worse in time you will think about her less, trust me I've been through the same thing

  • Party at clubs? Let yourself loose?

    Find another girl...?


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