Girls how would you feel about your recent breakup ex taking the situation well, Not being phased by break up?

Girls how would you feel if your recent ex, about a week ago, you broke up with him, and your upset, but it doesn't seem to phase him? How qould you feel if he was all happy talking to you, like laughing, but not really talking to you at all...this is after a long term relationship. Mine was 3 years.

I act like it doesn't bother me at all...and I don't think she likes that at all...its been about a week. I remember sending her a message saying like, "youll always be happy no matter what, if it be with your friends or probably someone else you find, you'll always be happy :)" I said that and she just said, "that was nice"

like does she get upset that I'm like this? might she come back? Ya I am upset she broke up with me, but I'm not getting my hopes up, she has come back once, but ya like I said I'm not sure if this is REALLY over or not...what do you think


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Most Helpful Girl

  • move on. I mean if you're upset be upset that's okay you don't have to be mr. macho or super nice guy to let her know. just send her one last text and say hey, this does bug me and I know you'll be happy one day whether or not its with me or with someone else. I love you and ill always care about you but right now I need space for me and I hope that you'll always be in my life but I need sometime to get used to us not being together.

    Then when you feel comfortable talk to her again. I mean you were in a relationship for a really long time and while I know you don't want to lose this person you also need to get space and clarity for you. No one can miss someone or get things straightened out unless they go without that person. You get what you allow from the situation and I'm not saying take time to see if she comes back I'm saying take time to be okay without her... you were for the rest of your life before her and you'll be okay without her. its like you said you'll be happy either way and so will she. But talking to her and texting her and pretending it doesn't hurt when it does well that's not real... that's just hiding it and hoping that it all works out.

    Also, if you really want her back have a conversation with her and tell her that. and if it doesn't go the way you want it at least you and her will get some real closure and then walk away and really walk away. take some space the key here is not playing games its being honest. its taking space that is needed and defining boundaries.

    I do think its typical guy behavior but I also think that's why guys turn into jerks they never take time to heal and just be okay again. its like you guys are so good at compartmentalizing things that you take your future insecurities (baggage) out on the next girl. if it doesn't bug you that's cool too but give her space anyways just because she broke up with you and she might appear happy its still getting used to you not being together. it still hurts. that's why break ups are hard and that's why they don't always feel right even when its the right thing to do.

    hope that helps.

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    • i understand. I'm not really playing games, I'm just I guess, a little happy I'm handling it better then I thought I would...i miss her alot...but I want to give her her space...i am handling it well, but the only thing I'm worried about is her finding someone else right now...its not in my control and I can't do anything about it...but I t will always hurt if she finds someone else...especially if its like, soon.

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    • i know , your right. I do have that bit of hope she might come back...i just want to let that go...thats what's keeping me here.

    • the only person who can let that go dear is you. you have to actively choose to let it go that means don't call her don't waste your time wondering about her move on be strong enough to do that. do something to stay busy reconnect with your friends go out and have fun. live life in a world where so much bad happens don't harbor on it just hope that she's well and happy and hope the same for yourself and whether you are together or not that will make you stronger.

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What Girls Said 5

  • I think its typical guy behavior to act as though something doesn't effect them. I got divorced after 10 years and my ex would call our daughter and be all happy and cheerful and laughing everytime. I just figured it was his way of dealing with the emotions. I'd rather have a cheerful, laughing ex, than one who was maudlin and angry. It's easier for me.

    If she broke up with you and you want her back, you'll do better having an actual conversation with her rather than playing games and hoping she'll see how happy you are and want to come back. Games are for kids.

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  • It reeeaaally depends. Sometimes girls really do dump guys and couldn't care less about if they're upset or not, but then there are those cases where we can feel a bit upset when they just seem to be so happy, almost acting like the relationship never meant anything in the first place. It depends on how things ended and what happened. So there isn't much of a answer to your main question as feelings are different from one relationship to the other. The best you can do is probably just still talk to her and just ignore her reply to your text. If she wants to come back she will. Even though it's hurting, just try and act relatively happy. I'm not saying go all out and show the world you're single and go all out crazy, but try and not be too sad, or too happy. But after a few weeks and nothing, I would advice you to take it as a final sign and move on. Give things time, wait it out for a while and good luck :)

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    • ya your right, but thnaks!

  • oh my god, this gets girls so confused and upset, if she is not over you. it might bring her back, or it could just make her think your an ass who never loved her... ahaha I guess time will tell.

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  • YES SHE GETS ANGRY You DUMBO no offense its like showing you didn't care about her AT ALL that she didn't matter to you don't play tough guy all the time if a guy didn't show emotion after a break up id b hurt id think wow I wasted my time with him he didn't care about me I just another girl to date nothing special I don't know if she will come back but not the way your treating the break up show your sad but don't like break out crying or anything

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    • i understand what your saying. but we have an extremely long history together after 3 years. basically I'm giving her time, and giving myself time to find our happiness again and figure ourselves out...thats what I'm doing.

    • ya but you can do that without crying your eyes out if you want to move on that's fine but don't show NO emotion id think ud show at least a little emotion at first but I guess not...

  • when I broke up with my long term boyfriend it was really upsetting to see him happy and that he had moved on, even though I was over him. therefore it's hard to say how she feels. she may want you back, or it might just be that you were together for a long time, which makes it a lot harder. I think that you should move on, you've already broke up once before so that shows if you were to get back together again the same issues would surface and you're back to same point. hope this helpss x

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    • i feel that with our history she might want me back...but I'm moving on, not getting my hopes up

    • it depends how serious you are about her...like can you imagine marrying her or not? if not then I think you should definitely put this relationship behind you

What Guys Said 3

  • Im in the same boat man all I can say is do not contact her watsoever. If she happens to date someone else you need not worry man cause most of the time she is only dating him as a means of comfort herself and ease the pain of the breakup. This does not last at all. Just keep your cool man and focus on your life. Try to become a new person. get new clotches a new haricut. a new cologne. If she somehow meets you and sees you different she will be interseted in the new u. Just try to have fun and really use that no contact rule as it really helps!

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    • thanks buddy...nice name too ;)

  • Epic win man. I don't know how your pulling it off but keep it up. Maybe she will eventually come around to realize that your a good guy and take you back. Either that or you don't have to worry too much about little emotions that would normally crush someone and make it impossible to recover.

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  • Your ex is trying to show you that it's okay to be friends. Sometimes

    people need to be free to see if the grass is really greener on

    the other side of the fence.

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