How to deal with an ex boyfriend, who wants to stay friends and be close again?

We had been together for 5 months. Yesterday he told me, that his feelings are weak and he feels lie an asshole. I lost my virginity with him a month ago. He says he can't have sex anymore, it was good, but he couldn't feel much. But he told me he cares about me and wants to be close again. He said he will never break our connection and he will stay with my till the end, but now, he can't feel anything romantic. He wants to be his close person and be with him, not be cold towards him, but... I'm hurt. I love him, I'm sure about that. I do care about him and I agreed to stay friends, but it's difficult, you know. I can't imagine him with someone else. It's my first serious relationship.
I'm 20 and already experienced 3 heartbreaks, all of them were very painful. I can't stand this anymore. I can't tell anything to anyone, but I want to hurt myself physically. He thinks I'm the best person on earth, his ideal, the strongest one, and he feels my pain. I really love him and I can do anything to be with him, but please, tell me what to do NOW. I'm sitting at my room and crying all day. I want to be the worst person on earth and I really want his love. My problem is that I'm too respectful and rational, but I can't stand this anymore. I was diagnosed with depression 2 years ago and now it starts again. Please help me. Thanks.
How to deal with an ex boyfriend, who wants to stay friends and be close again?
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