How to feel about this?

Yesterday was 4 weeks that i broke up with my ex. I've known her for close to 10 years, were together for 4, of those we lived 2 years together. We were also engaged.

We moved back home with our parents in order for her to pay down her student loans. Which is something i agreed with. I decided to move to AZ due to my work was relocating. We were engaged yet our relationship was rocky at times. I made the decision to move 4 hrs away from where she lives with her parents and set up shop in AZ. It was a place where we had talked before about moving and building a life since its cheaper than CA. The long distance was a killer, long story short, i felt neglected, unwanted, we would hang out here and there but was only temporary hapiness. Many times i talked to her about our communication and how that was key to making this work. Towards the end i felt like i was going crazy, and at this point i felt i was being ghosted, no clear move date either. I ended the relationship and have not contacted her in 4 weeks.

I've gone through every possible emotion from anger to sadness to feeling guilty. It wasn't a dramatic breakup, yet to this day i keep asking myself "Why didn't she fight for me?". Today is my birthday, why am i thinking or feeling if she's going to wish me a happy bday? I told myself that i would only ask for the engagement ring only once. Its materialistic stuff. I asked for it when i broke up. Maybe that was a douche move but i did. 10 years of knowing her 4 years together, engaged and it ended in less than 5 min, with no fight from her to try and make it work.

At this point im just confused, did she also want this to happen? it seemed like it to me. Its true its like detoxing from drugs wen u do NO CONTACT, its mentally, physically and emotionally tough. I did everything to try and make this work. What does it mean if i dont hear from her today on my bday?

Any feedback would be appreciated.
How to feel about this?
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