Am I a psycho ex?

I dated a guy for a few months but we were good friends before. He was very open to me and said he was lucky to have me. He introduced me to his family on Christmas Day and they were so nice and treated me like a close friend it made me so happy to have that.
But after a while he didn't want to hang out on the weekends and wouldn't reply back as much to my calls or text. I made sure I gave him space and waited every few days to check in. I asked If he even liked talking to me and he said he didn't know. After he said it he repeated it again but with more fear/sadness. I was hurt.
He said there was something about his past and that he does want to be with me but stuff is affecting him. He couldn't do a relationship. But sometimes that means something else though right? Maybe I was too clingy and he wouldn't confront any issues?
I did eventually break up with him feeling a lot of weight fall off my shoulders because I didn't have to feel awful and ignored and we ended on good terms. But after he was checking in on me out of guilt asking if I was okay. It lit a spark in me and I wanted him back and to make him smile again.
But my persistence in trying to help him and be by his side never made him respond back. He avoided me and never truly explained anything. He said I never annoyed him but a friend of his said that "He wished I just died because I of how annoying I was". I didn't realize I was annoying until he blocked my number
I honestly tried for a very long time to move on and leave him alone. He has to figure things out but I also am in pain.
I am never respected and I need closure and to make sure he's not hurting himself. He's a complicated and confused person and I know he can get things together but not alone. Either I'm his friend or lover I want to be there while he gets his shit together I guess because I really do understand. It's hard to let people in without feeling like a burden or weak.
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How can I get him to talk to me? would it be wrong to try and message him on facebook? maybe just saying merry Christmas or happy birthday?
Am I a psycho ex?
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