My ex said he fucked up, asked for a second chance and then disappeared on me. I am very angry but also sad. Why can't I help feeling sad?

Anonymous
We have been on-off for 3 years and it was me who left 1.5 years ago. Though I went on with my life after I left, I still thought of him every now and then. He had contacted me after 6 months but I kept my no contact because mainly I was very pissed off at his behavior and really wanted to be set free and I thought I was until I realized I wasn't and shot him a text asking how he was doing. That's when he unexpectedly 'declared his love', admitted his past mistakes and said he would not let his chance go by again.
My ex said he fucked up, asked for a second chance and then disappeared on me. I am very angry but also sad. Why can't I help feeling sad?
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