sometimes i just feel like he ignores me until he is ready to talk or when it’s for his convenience. he broke up with me came back and i think i just handled me being upset or frustrating with things in a way of wanting to confront right away instead of just letting things go. recently he’s been kinda distant I don't know if i should express why i had been mad or off putting or wait for him to be ready to talk bout things on his own. if that makes any sense.
So it looks like you kind of have a similar situation to me in which it seems to affect you quite heavily and I'm sure it is probably quite draining. So if I have to suggest anything ( would advise getting a lot more opinions still) it would be to wait a little bit after something that annoys him happens could be anywhere from 30minutes and up and then maybe try talk with him by then he should hopefully have got past the initial anger/annoyance and maybe realised he was being stupid or overreacting. If it does affect you badly in terms of your mental state I would definitely say tell him that because it could be a changing point but I'm also talking from my own perspective you're the only one that really knows how he will act. If you dont mind me asking what sort of thing happened in which he became distant (no need to answer that)
he broke up with me and then after a year of me never reaching out i guess he caved in and missed me to an extent to tell me he wanted me in his life again. the only thing is at first he was great and everything was great then he started just kind of not answering as often or not engaging in conversations as much i felt like i was always making plans when before he would suggest doing stuff i got upset and i tried to express that and if i didn’t like an answer i just blocked him i think after a couple times i became the problem. i fear as tho maybe he will lose interest because i’ve been mentally sick over the thought of things ending that i created scenarios or problems that didn’t even exist. i just don’t know if maybe a paragraph of interest or how much he means to me with an explanation of my behavior will make things right or if it’s just a lost cause. i do think i’m draining or annoying but i sometimes don’t know how to handle situations with him that frustrate me or when i feel neglected. i didn’t answer for two weeks after i got mad and lashed out he reached out a couple days ago we have been casually talking each day I don't know when the time would be to make things right.
So the blocking things I do think would become quite taxing on him and I think keeping that communication channel open is a lot better then just closing it out of anger, rather just take a few minutes to cool off before just doing. The question I have to ask though is when you lash out (assuming it's just a moment of anger and not like a huge relationship issue) are you ever the one to apologize first and reopen communication or is it generally him?
i feel like if it’s ever resolved it’s generally him trying to change conversation but i am first to apologize
He seems like somebody that is willing to just let things go after thinking on it. So if you really think that it affects you badly to not sort out an issue you've got to try and talk to him about that, just make sure that you dont get immediately defensive and try stay calm because that can make some people put a wall up like you won't believe. So I think the sooner you talk to him would probably be better since you have fears of him becoming disinterested but i think keeping it calm is important.
do you think a text explaining my intentions and my behavior throughout the process is a good idea or is it too soon and i should wait for him to bring something up i fear that i will push him away further.
So I just want to say that these are just the ways I prefer to/ want to have things dealt with me, you're the only person that knows him properly so you have to ask yourself how he's reacted to things in the past when you've tried on what's the best thing to do. My opinion would be that explaining everything to him would be better then doing nothing but if you're not comfortable acting right now then if things are on the up at the moment waiting until you feel like you're both in a better place would probably be ideal.
okay thank you so much for your help it’s much appreciated.
Good luck with everything :)
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