almost 5 months ago, i broke up with my boyfriend, because I'm apparently hella immature wasn't ready to lose the relationship yet, I told him we could stay friends. Huge mistake on my part honestly. Now, I know the fastest way I'll be able to get over him is to cut off contact. But it's so hard, we were best friends before we dated, and it's not like I can just make new friends with covid and all. If I was actually in school, I wouldn't think twice about telling him I needed space to heal. But instead, I have about 6 people I regularly contact, him being one of them. If I stop talking to him, I lose someone I really do care about. I can't believe I agreed to get together with him this weekend, but I bailed last time, and I just feel so bad hurting him, Sometimes, I wish he was a terrible person so I wouldn't feel as bad. I don't want to play with his feelings, and I just don't know what to do. Please give me whatever advice you have.