How can you feel normal again after a partner falls in love with somebody else?

Anonymous
I was in a relationship that ended, turned sexual, got back together, and then went crazy. The guy fell in love with somebody else. I still struggle to overcome the betrayal I feel. I looked for ways to get past it and was advised to “try to understand why it happened.” I won’t lie, I hate that part. It’s hard because I wasn’t doing that great back then but a huge reason why was because of my circle of friends and family leaching off of me. My ex boyfriend didn’t know what I was going through and I desperately wanted to open myself up to him because I loved him. But he was not understanding my side of things. Admittedly, I thought he was better than me. He had everything I didn’t have, and I had to work to just get on track. I’m doing good now, much better than before. But that was the first time in my life where I felt worthless. He just brought out a terrible feeling in me that Was just worse because I wish I was worth a goodbye or some honesty. If I wasn’t what he wanted I at least wish he had said so instead of lying. I hate these feelings and I want to cry just thinking about them. I also feel like I can’t bring myself to understand his point of view. Understanding his point of view feels like spitting in my own face. It’s like admitting that just because I was going through problems that I deserved to be played. I wasn’t perfect but I was good to him. Understanding his side of things feels like admitting everything I tried so hard to overcome-the feeling of worthless being true
How can you feel normal again after a partner falls in love with somebody else?
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