Should divorce courts consider and 'punish' adultery?

Question

Should a court dividing spousal assets favour a spouse who can prove their partner cheated on them?

Yes

No

Other

Select age and gender to cast your vote:

GirlGuy

Answer 1

Chriscunning | 88 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Xper 6

I think it's very narrow minded to say yes.

Lets say for example I am an abuse husband and always treat my wife terrible. She meets a guy at work, sparks fly and the next thing we getting divorced. Is it fair she should be punished for leaving an abusive relationship?

Both people need to keep each other happy in a relationship, if the one decides they no longer willing to put in the effort and the other meets someone new. Is it fair to punish the one who needs are not being met?

I agree that in both cases you should leave and become single. But it's not always viable financially. In abusive relationships it takes a lot of courage to leave. In some circumstances you unintentionally meet someone and like them.

Then also what is adultery. Is it sex or is it love, or is it both? If I go to a hooker is that me being a cheater (remember with hookers its a business deal)? Or if I merely fall in love with someone and think of them 24/7, is that me committing adultery?

Answer 2

Unit1 | 234 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

Don't they already do that without even any history of adultery involved in America?

Should divorce courts consider and 'punish' adultery?

Answer 3

ashley_85

Xper 1

Because in a lot of States adultery is still against the law and whether or not it's a law that is really prosecuted civilly courts are set up to justify what they can't do criminally.

BirdshotJohn

22 d
Sorry, can you rephrase that second half?

Not sure if you're saying that the civil courts shouldn't be considering the adultery because it should be being prosecuted separately; or if you're saying that they should consider it because of the law that has been broken.

(Where I live Adultery has been legal since the 1980's; and courts are specifically prohibited from considering it when dividing assets in a divorce.)
ashley_85

22 d
I'm saying that even in the states where it's illegal very rarely is it prosecuted criminally and so having a civil system to rectify where the criminal system has failed to do its job I believe is just
BirdshotJohn

22 d
Roger roger, agreed.

Answer 4

BirdshotJohn

Sorry, can you rephrase that second half?

Not sure if you're saying that the civil courts shouldn't be considering the adultery because it should be being prosecuted separately; or if you're saying that they should consider it because of the law that has been broken.

(Where I live Adultery has been legal since the 1980's; and courts are specifically prohibited from considering it when dividing assets in a divorce.)

Answer 5

ashley_85

I'm saying that even in the states where it's illegal very rarely is it prosecuted criminally and so having a civil system to rectify where the criminal system has failed to do its job I believe is just

Answer 6

BirdshotJohn

Roger roger, agreed.

Answer 7

Keyboardkat

Xper 6

That is the worst kind of betrayal of trust. It shows a kind of arrogance and selfishness, and an ability to rationalize just about anything. Listen, the world is full of beautiful people. There will always be others out there who attract you. That doesn't mean that have to act on it! Think with your head, not with your gonads! Whatever you think you'll get out of the adulterous relationship isn't worth the price you'll pay, not only in money, but in shame and guilt (assuming you have a conscience). The tears running down your spouse's face, a person who trusted you, who built a life with you. And what about your children? What will you tell them?

Answer 8

iAMtheT0ASTER

Xper 4

YES, but not with jail time or anything like that. The cheating partner should be entitled to NOTHING during the divorce. I've seen so many men (sometimes women) get completely fucked over in divorce courts by their cheating wife. He loses the house, the car, custody of the kids, the savings account that's mostly his money, and he's now sleeping on his buddy's futon while his cheating bitch of an ex-wife gets everything he worked for and moves her new boyfriend in. It's disgusting.

Answer 9

Redred56

Xper 4

No I wouldn’t like to see that happen although it very well may, It will be a long day for the women in this country.
There already is such a thing. I believe where it exist is India (Don’t hold me to it),
If our system happened to be in the same galaxy as theirs, You women would be hating
life.

Answer 10

COMMODOREII | 286 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

They should be put on a database like sex offenders so people dating can verify if they are trust worthy.

Answer 11

jasco | 98 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Guru

I mean its ilegal already tho but the court shouldn't be involved in such matters. That's you and him/her thing

Answer 12

The_Maphio

Xper 7

They should indeed favour the hurt part of the couple, or penalize the one thta caused the breakup.
I don't see that happening anytime soon, though.

Answer 13

genericname85 | 208 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

is that not already the case? if not, then yes i think, they should.

Answer 14

ThisAndThat | 99 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Guru

This poll alone proves MGTOW is justified and no man should ever marry. If a man marries he gets exactly what he's asking for.

BirdshotJohn

22 d
Right now we have "yes, courts should punish cheaters" winning with 60% yes among both genders.

I should think that that would be... mildly encouraging for those who feel the institution has been broken? I mean, it would be more concerning if the numbers were reversed and 60% thought there should be no consequence to breaking marriage vows.
ThisAndThat

22 d
Yes it's near 50 / 50. Given courts do not consider adultery aka go by no fault divorce and everybody knows how the high level of divorce and who files mostly that being women who wins in around 85% of all cases even with infidelity involved and woman committing it, yet still taking nearly everything, why would any man get married.

Answer 15

BirdshotJohn

Right now we have "yes, courts should punish cheaters" winning with 60% yes among both genders.

I should think that that would be... mildly encouraging for those who feel the institution has been broken? I mean, it would be more concerning if the numbers were reversed and 60% thought there should be no consequence to breaking marriage vows.

Answer 16

ThisAndThat

Yes it's near 50 / 50. Given courts do not consider adultery aka go by no fault divorce and everybody knows how the high level of divorce and who files mostly that being women who wins in around 85% of all cases even with infidelity involved and woman committing it, yet still taking nearly everything, why would any man get married.

Answer 17

Anonymous

No, because guys are too insensitive and emotionless even to realize what makes a girl cheat on them in first place.

BirdshotJohn

23 d
So "They deserved to be cheated on because they had a low EQ, vows be damned"?

Dear God, I hope you never marry.
mamasan

22 d
I agree with @BirdshotJohn. There's simply no excuse for cheating. If you're unhappy in the relationship, at least have the human decency to leave before you betray someone like that.
Pete671

22 d
if you not happy, leave,
Show All Show Less
Pete671

22 d
@mamasan perfectly said Ma'am!
mistixs

22 d
Cheaters aren't victims
modelUN242

21 d
You're a bad person.

Answer 18

BirdshotJohn

So "They deserved to be cheated on because they had a low EQ, vows be damned"?

Dear God, I hope you never marry.

Answer 19

mamasan

I agree with @BirdshotJohn. There's simply no excuse for cheating. If you're unhappy in the relationship, at least have the human decency to leave before you betray someone like that.

Answer 20

Pete671

if you not happy, leave,

Answer 21

Pete671

@mamasan perfectly said Ma'am!

Answer 22

mistixs

Cheaters aren't victims

Answer 23

modelUN242

You're a bad person.

Answer 24

msc545 | 196 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Guru

Yes. No-fault divorce means anyone can get away with almost anything and get rewarded for it.

Answer 25

Anonymous

yes, if you dont want to commit to each other then don't get married

Answer 26

slatyb | 383 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

They can and do in some cases.

Answer 27

modelUN242

Explorer

Yeah, no-fault divorce is stupid.

Answer 28

Anonymous

no to much death in the court system

follow the words of GOD or death will come to that person

Pete671

22 d
cheaters are already unwell, or even dead spiritually,,,

Answer 29

Pete671

cheaters are already unwell, or even dead spiritually,,,

Answer 30

karaspara

Xper 6

Yes when it comes to divorce settlements

Answer 31

blondfrog | 228 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

Yes and a few states actually do like MA.

Answer 32

doopayo

Xper 6

It depends from case to case, so yes and no

Answer 33

Iron_Man | 1.5K opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

Yes sure

Answer 34

Anonymous

Nope.

Answer 35

In_Trance | 758 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Master

Nope

Answer 36

Jamie05rhs | 132 opinions shared on Break Up & Divorce topic.

Guru

Absolutely!

Answer 37

jahaims

Yoda

They do

BirdshotJohn

23 d
Depends where you are in the world. Many jurisdictions changed their laws in the past 50 years to specifically prohibit courts considering infidelity. Example:

"For the purposes of making any determination pursuant to section 21, 22
or 23, no court shall have regard to immoral or improper conduct on the part
of a spouse"

Answer 38

BirdshotJohn

Depends where you are in the world. Many jurisdictions changed their laws in the past 50 years to specifically prohibit courts considering infidelity. Example:

"For the purposes of making any determination pursuant to section 21, 22
or 23, no court shall have regard to immoral or improper conduct on the part
of a spouse"

Should divorce courts consider and 'punish' adultery?

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