How do you get from heartbroken to pissed-off?

How do you get over being hurt and start getting crazy mad at the person who hurt you? Any ideas on how to get ANGRY, especially when you still care about the person that hurt you? Long story short, a "friend" really dissed me by cutting me off without a word when I refused to date him (he's married). I'm having a hard time dealing with how abrupt and mean this guy has been...when for the last 10+ years, he has ONLY been a great friend and a perfect gentleman. I'm tired of feeling confused, now I want to start feeling mad...at him. Any advice how?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You'll get there eventually without doing anything special. It's all a part of the process. Shock, denial, sadness, ANGER, acceptance. However, there are some things you will start to consider. Is his marriage happy or do his wife and kids at least think so? If so, ask yourself "why would he treat HER like that? She's x and y positive quailities! She's been good and honest to him for (however long they've been married). Why would he throw her away for me?" Then think about why he wouldn't have more respect for both his marriage AND your friendship. If this is the way he views both, then after a certain point, neither you nor his wife were anything more to him than toys. It really seems as if he does not have a great deal of value on either of you.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Unfortunately you see people's true colors when it comes to situations like this. You THOUGHT he was a gentlemen but in reality he was just a scumbag. You need to leave it be. Get over him not wanting to be your friend, it sounds like you really didn't loose much since he was acting fake towards you anyways. Go out and meet new people and find new friends to spend your time on. Its never good to replace a bad feeling with anger because chances are you'll take it out on people who don't deserve it nor do they deserve to have things ruined, like trust and friendship, just because of one rotten apple.

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  • are you also married? He probably thinks it's best to end any relationship/friendships you two had; esp, it is very obvious he is not leaving his wife and family. It is typical to be mad or stay mad at someone that hurts you, but for what? to get revenge? You only hurt yourself. Let it go; maybe all you feel right now is that he doesn't deserve a caring and faithful friend like you. Who knows, maybe he ends thing abruptly to protect you and both of you from any more harms or negavtivity.

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    • No, I'm single...and certainly don't want to risk my heart getting involved with a married man. I'm just totally floored and can't believe that a friend of so many years could behave the way he has. Never thought he could ever do anything like this to me.

  • Wants his cake and eat it too! Been there done that..run as fast as you can...he's a pig!

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