Ex girlfriend's boyfriend approached me and asked if we were cool?

So my ex and I had a great relationship until she broke my heart. She is young (23) and very immature both mentally and emotionally. She dumped me in a horrible way and never looked back. For 2 months after she went and partied, slept around and whatever. Now she has a new boyfriend. A couple Sunday's ago, they happened to be at the bar I usually go to for football. She knows I go there, she knows I am there every Sunday but she still went and brought him. They left very quickly after my arrival. So today I am out for lunch with a friend and he went back to work, so I went over to the bar and had a drink. The boyfriend was there with a group of friends and as he was leaving came over and extended his hand to ask if we were "cool". I said yeah, we are cool don't worry about it. He shook my hand about 5 times and patted me on the back and stuff almost like he was so relieved I didn't want to kick his ass. I said my ex was a good girl (which she isn't) and that I wished them both well.. As he was leaving, I made it a point to tell him to "be careful". So I am chalking this up as a win for me. But, it makes me wonder what he will say to her about our encounter. Will he tell her that we met up and that we are cool with each other? How will she react? She is completely immature both mentally and emotionally as I've stated previously and I don't give them more than a few months together. So what will she say/do/think when he tells her we met up?


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  • First off... if this girl is so immature, then you really shouldn't have a broken heart. If anything you should be relieved that this is over. Nevertheless, regardless of whether they last a couple of months or not... I fail to see how this is a "win" for you. If anything, she will be the one to break up with him so it just ends up being a vicious cycle in which she doesn't care. You shouldn't be keeping tab anyways, this isn't your relationship anymore.

    As for your questions, he'll probably just say exactly what you said. Guys don't tend to over analyze and be over dramatic when talking about an event that happened. Its pretty straight forward "So I went up to your ex before I left for ___(Insert whatever reason)____ and asked if we were cool. He said, 'Yeah, we're cool.' Shook his hands a couple of times and he said that you were a good girl and that he wished us well. And be careful." If anyone is going to have questions, it'll be her, but in all honesty, she probably won't care. And as for the bar... count it as coincidence. Sure, she might know you go there often and on certain days, but that doesn't mean she isn't entitled to go there at all on those days. More over, it could be he wanted to go and thus... he took her, not she took him.

    Her reactions? Probably really apathetic and uncaring. She may wonder "what did he mean by 'be careful'" but in all honesty, it almost sounded like you were telling him to be careful and to treat her right 'because she's a good girl.' Not so much of a warning that 'she's a heart breaker. At this point, however, I really don't think it matters what she says, or does. She is past you, and you should move on. Quit letting this bite down on you and own you. You don't gain anything if they last a week or if they get married. You may feel you get some satisfaction, but you really won't. You want satisfaction? Move on and find a girl worth your time.

    • She drove, she took him. Also, don't talk down to me I am not a moron. I am much older than you and much more experienced in life and relationships. Just because one is immature doesn't mean I still can't have developed and kept feelings for her. I am quite relieved it is over and I view this as the final chapter of my closure from her and what we had. I am sure he will not over-analyze this either. She is a bitch and I am not expecting her to care. The "be careful" was because she breaks hearts

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    • First... I'm not talking down on you. I *sarcastically* apologize if my advice comes bluntly and appears to be rude. I just prefer to not waste time with sugar coating. I was merely insinuating that your comment on "she broke my heart" should be more relief if she is what you claim she is.

      Furthermore, if you want women to answer, then you should specify. Several users specify if they want women to answer or nott.

      Lastly, you have no idea how much I've experienced. I won't argue age, but

    • my experiences make me no less available to offer advice and thoughts for consideration than anyone else. By all means, don't let me offend you for taking the time to read your story and offering my thoughts. Feel free to just ignore it, its all just opinion anyway.

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