Her sister tells me she wants a different relationship. When we go out to hang and we're just talking she tells me its not a date and I'm usually confused Because I didn't say anything. She does know that I want her but she seems to believe that I don't love her Because of how the relationship went. It was both our first and I was not good at showing emotion which I regret Because I still love her deeply. So, in a nut shell to me it seems like she thinks of me in a bad light but even though she tells me she's not in love with me that there is something there but she wants her wall up from falling back completely.
I want to get back together with her badly but I feel like I'm in a game. I want to pull myself away so I won't hurt when she tells me I never cared but when she sees me she wants to cuddle or gives me goo goo eyes Because she can't help it. I'd like to find a way to make our friendship stronger so it could have a chance to get back to a more healthy relationship but that wall is up. And I know people have a hard time gaining trust.
I have no idea what to do in general really. I care for her deeply and wish she could see it. I was always there for her when something big happened. But I let my guard down today and told her that I'm nice to her Because I love her. (didnt say in love). And she told me I'm full of crap with a happy face behind it, then called me like nothing happened. This is why I feel like I'm in a game. Why does she want to be around me, cuddle me, do all those things, and then when I open up she tells me its not true? What can I do to show her I care deeply?